[Adam Riff] The captains of industry over at Adam Riff have been running weekly clips from a Jackass-style video made by Respect Authority, many of which are positively cringe-worthy. This week’s installment features the young gentleman on the receiving end of the most unsanitary and most improperly placed nipple piercing in the history of both nipples and piercing. If you’re the sort of person who’s offended by piercings being performed without gloves, some manner of sanitizer, or any adherence to anatomy whatsoever, you should probably shoot yourself in the eyeballs before watching this.
I think I just puked my pants.
[Big League Stew] ‘Duk over at Yahoo! Sports’s Big League Stew passes along a video from Mouthpiece Sports featuring the world’s last remaining Barry Bonds fan. Bonds, of course, was found guilty by an international tribunal of mass-producing all the world’s steroids in a sweatshop inside his skull and running around cold stickin’ baseball players with syringes full of dinosaur semen and such. After his conviction, he was sentenced to fight Jose Canseco to the death inside the Thunderdome, but was granted clemency, and now lives on a remote steroid farm in the Canadian north with Mark McGwire and their seven children. Anyway, this is one of the kids, showing off his Barry Bonds jersey tattoo:
[Right Celebrity] Sweet holy dogshit this is the most awkward thing I’ve seen all day. World-famous playboy and the only man who can pull off the three-day mustache, Brad Pitt, was on Oprah the other day fielding questions from every maniac with a microphone, apparently. At one point, some fan-girl from the Oprah head office hijacked a video feed and began pestering Pitt about his tattoos, which, he, as someone resembling a normal person, didn’t want to discuss on account of them being private. The conversation went something like this:
Insane Woman: HEY BRAD BIG FAN HUGE FAN HEY POP OFF THAT SHIRT AND LET’S SEE SOME TATSSSS
Brad Pitt: Ha ha, good one, but I’d rather not. It’s a fun connection to have with your partner, but it’s private.
Insane Woman: NO REALLY I HEARD YOU GOT A SICK ICEMAN TAT ON YOUR ARM! HAHAHA WHAT DOES ICEMAN MEAN, DOES IT MEAN YOU WANNA DO SOME CRAZY SEXING WITH ME, HAHA GODDAMN BOOYAH
Brad Pitt: Please stop asking me about my tattoos, they’re personal.
Insane Woman: C’MONNN RIP OPEN THAT SWEATER AND LET’S FREAK RIGHT ON THE TOM CRUISE COUCH, I SEEN PIXXX OF SOME INK ON YOUR TUM-TUM, YOU GONNA SWEAT IT OFFFFFF OH SHIT
Brad Pitt: I am leaving the planet of earth.
Comments
64 responses to “Full Coverage: Links From All Over (Ill-Advised Video Edition)”
he’s alosser
he’s alosser
I ain’t a Brad Pitt fan but I don’t think that just because you have a tattoo means you need to show everyone, nor have people undress you/move your clothing to see it. Not everyone who gets a tattoo wants to be an attention whore.
I ain’t a Brad Pitt fan but I don’t think that just because you have a tattoo means you need to show everyone, nor have people undress you/move your clothing to see it. Not everyone who gets a tattoo wants to be an attention whore.
^What I mean is that if it’s showing it’s showing, if it’s not, doesn’t mean you should have to just because its on your arm or wrist or leg or whatever.
^What I mean is that if it’s showing it’s showing, if it’s not, doesn’t mean you should have to just because its on your arm or wrist or leg or whatever.
Vid 1- It’s fun watching drunk or stupid people fail at attempts of home piercing. After seeing that video, I thanked god that I had the sense to get all mine done by a professional.
Vid 2- Not the kind of tattoo I would get, but if it makes him happy, cool.
Vid 3- The write up was hilarious, and the vid was uncomfortable. Serves Brad right for wearing that ‘stache in public.
Vid 1- It’s fun watching drunk or stupid people fail at attempts of home piercing. After seeing that video, I thanked god that I had the sense to get all mine done by a professional.
Vid 2- Not the kind of tattoo I would get, but if it makes him happy, cool.
Vid 3- The write up was hilarious, and the vid was uncomfortable. Serves Brad right for wearing that ‘stache in public.
@ 24
i agree in a lot of ways. i have a tattoo on my foot with my younger sisters name on it, and people always ask me “what happened?” and i get confused. because they expect that if i have her name tattooed on me that she must have died from some horrible disease/accident/whatever. it’s irritating but i’ll deal.
that nipple piercing video was terrrrrrrrrible. “i want you to punch me in the head in order to divert the pain”, oh yeah, brilliant idea!
i think Brad has a right to discuss what he wants to about his tattoos. they ARE his afterall, not everyone else’s, so what does it matter if he doesn’t want to talk about it? he didn’t get the tattoos for the public, so i’m sure everyone can deal with not knowing the meaning of Brad’s tattoos.
@ 24
i agree in a lot of ways. i have a tattoo on my foot with my younger sisters name on it, and people always ask me “what happened?” and i get confused. because they expect that if i have her name tattooed on me that she must have died from some horrible disease/accident/whatever. it’s irritating but i’ll deal.
that nipple piercing video was terrrrrrrrrible. “i want you to punch me in the head in order to divert the pain”, oh yeah, brilliant idea!
i think Brad has a right to discuss what he wants to about his tattoos. they ARE his afterall, not everyone else’s, so what does it matter if he doesn’t want to talk about it? he didn’t get the tattoos for the public, so i’m sure everyone can deal with not knowing the meaning of Brad’s tattoos.
Ginsberg, you are hilarious.
Ginsberg, you are hilarious.
The first one reminds me of a home video done of a woman having her outer labia pierced. No cleaning,no clamps, no gloves. Gave me the heebie-jebies. I doubt I’d ever trust anyone besides a pro to come near me with a needle
The first one reminds me of a home video done of a woman having her outer labia pierced. No cleaning,no clamps, no gloves. Gave me the heebie-jebies. I doubt I’d ever trust anyone besides a pro to come near me with a needle