A black-and-white photo of a person mid-air in a Superman-style body suspension pose, supported by multiple hooks in their back and legs, smiling joyfully toward the camera. They are suspended horizontally in a large indoor space with high ceilings and visible rigging. A group of onlookers—some seated, some standing—watch with expressions of admiration, amusement, and support. The atmosphere is lively and communal, capturing a moment of shared experience and transformation.

Cry Baby

I vaguely remember crying this much when I first had my ears pierced, I’ve toughened up a bit in the ten years since then though.

Humour aside if it were my kid (or if I were the piercer for that matter) I really would have to search myself very hard for any reason why it would be necessary or fair to pierce someone so young, someone that still isn’t able to control bodily functions most adults take for granted, let alone decide if it’s what they want. It certainly can’t be so they’re popular at nursery school, or because “all the other babies are doing it”.

Granted the physical trauma is minimal but I just don’t believe a baby belongs in a piercing environment, at all..

No offence to the mother (I’m assuming she’s the mother) in the photo but seeing my child in obvious distress, whether it be through physical pain, emotional stress or otherwise, would definitely lead me to reassess any decision that caused that distress, for a decade or so anyway.

I’m sure posting this will restart the “should kids be pierced” debate, so click the previous links then come back here if you feel like taking part or shouting at each other. Just don’t take the last two seriously..

Comments

476 responses to “Cry Baby”

  1. wigbendy Avatar
    wigbendy

    #98: Dagon:

    Cultural tradition has everything to do with it!
    This is why is is not “wrong” in some cultures

    Cultural tradition is why some here “think” it is wrong

    culture and tradition mandates what is socially “wrong”

    whats “right” for me is “wrong” for you

  2. wigbendy Avatar
    wigbendy

    #98: Dagon:

    Cultural tradition has everything to do with it!
    This is why is is not “wrong” in some cultures

    Cultural tradition is why some here “think” it is wrong

    culture and tradition mandates what is socially “wrong”

    whats “right” for me is “wrong” for you

  3. krys Avatar
    krys

    OK, so I wouldn’t do this to my kid. My daughter has started asking, and she’s 8, and I’m still not letting her. I got my lobes done when I was 14 – after much begging – by a gun somewhere. Followed by several weeks of infection…which may or may not be related.

    Point is, I wasn’t old enough to understand the aftercare required – even if it was ever explained to me or my Mum properly (my Mum was and still is totally clueless about such things). Having said that, they did heal, and are still there 21 years later, and I can happily go weeks without wearing jewellery without them healing up. All my subsequent piercings have been done “properly” by needles and professionals, and I’ve had way less grief with ‘em.

    It’s not just the piercing itself though. Playgrounds can be rough places at the best of times – without adding earrings that can be ripped out. Kids are supposed to play in the dirt – good for the immune system etc – but not so good for piercings.

    I just find it hard to understand the justification for doing this to your child. That is not a happy face you’re seeing there… I will let my daughter have hers done – properly by someone I trust – when she’s old enough to really know what she wants, and to understand the consequences of that. Including the pain!

  4. krys Avatar
    krys

    OK, so I wouldn’t do this to my kid. My daughter has started asking, and she’s 8, and I’m still not letting her. I got my lobes done when I was 14 – after much begging – by a gun somewhere. Followed by several weeks of infection…which may or may not be related.

    Point is, I wasn’t old enough to understand the aftercare required – even if it was ever explained to me or my Mum properly (my Mum was and still is totally clueless about such things). Having said that, they did heal, and are still there 21 years later, and I can happily go weeks without wearing jewellery without them healing up. All my subsequent piercings have been done “properly” by needles and professionals, and I’ve had way less grief with ‘em.

    It’s not just the piercing itself though. Playgrounds can be rough places at the best of times – without adding earrings that can be ripped out. Kids are supposed to play in the dirt – good for the immune system etc – but not so good for piercings.

    I just find it hard to understand the justification for doing this to your child. That is not a happy face you’re seeing there… I will let my daughter have hers done – properly by someone I trust – when she’s old enough to really know what she wants, and to understand the consequences of that. Including the pain!

  5. Aviram Avatar
    Aviram

    WHO KNOWS, THE KID MIGHT END UP TO BE HEAVILY BODY MOD IN THE FUTURE.

  6. Aviram Avatar
    Aviram

    WHO KNOWS, THE KID MIGHT END UP TO BE HEAVILY BODY MOD IN THE FUTURE.

  7. Clara Avatar

    britishinvasion, i’m sure that if you feel the back of the cartilage piercings there will be bits of raised tissue or cartilage? That’s the cracked cartilage.

    And if your ears healed fine to a gunned cartilage, i’m sure they’d heal even better to a needled cartilage.

  8. Clara Avatar

    britishinvasion, i’m sure that if you feel the back of the cartilage piercings there will be bits of raised tissue or cartilage? That’s the cracked cartilage.

    And if your ears healed fine to a gunned cartilage, i’m sure they’d heal even better to a needled cartilage.

  9. The Lizardman Avatar

    For all the cultural relativists defending this on the basis of it being considered ok in some cultures, the usual ‘food for thought’ rejoinder is to ask if it is them ok to do any number of horrible things just because some culture at some time didn’t object to them – by this basis rape and murder can become ok. Yes, cultural relativity is good at showing how many ideas and ethics are dependent upon a prevailing societal opinion but you don’t stop there, the next step is to realize that any good ethical system will then be based upon trans-cultural prinicples such as doing no undeserved harm (‘undeserved harm’ is how evil is often defined for terms of ethical discussion). When a cultural practice violates such principles it can very rightly be said to be wrong.

    Now, to be productive please turn your discussion towards arguing whether or not having your incapable of consenting baby pierced in an unhygenic, unprofessional manner constitutes undeserved harm (and/or unacceptable risk thereof)

  10. The Lizardman Avatar

    For all the cultural relativists defending this on the basis of it being considered ok in some cultures, the usual ‘food for thought’ rejoinder is to ask if it is them ok to do any number of horrible things just because some culture at some time didn’t object to them – by this basis rape and murder can become ok. Yes, cultural relativity is good at showing how many ideas and ethics are dependent upon a prevailing societal opinion but you don’t stop there, the next step is to realize that any good ethical system will then be based upon trans-cultural prinicples such as doing no undeserved harm (‘undeserved harm’ is how evil is often defined for terms of ethical discussion). When a cultural practice violates such principles it can very rightly be said to be wrong.

    Now, to be productive please turn your discussion towards arguing whether or not having your incapable of consenting baby pierced in an unhygenic, unprofessional manner constitutes undeserved harm (and/or unacceptable risk thereof)

  11. Amandagee Avatar

    her kid she can do what she wants.

  12. Amandagee Avatar

    her kid she can do what she wants.

  13. RooRaaah Crumbs Avatar

    Max Brand ‘ “what if your baby or kid had to get a shot at the doctor….”

    I was referring to piercings, not something that could prevent illness.

  14. RooRaaah Crumbs Avatar

    Max Brand ‘ “what if your baby or kid had to get a shot at the doctor….”

    I was referring to piercings, not something that could prevent illness.

  15. Zoltar Avatar
    Zoltar

    i was circumcised as an infant, i obviously didnt have any say in it, so i don’t see much of a difference or am i wrong in this comparison

  16. Zoltar Avatar
    Zoltar

    i was circumcised as an infant, i obviously didnt have any say in it, so i don’t see much of a difference or am i wrong in this comparison

  17. j.c. @ PANGEA Avatar

    my point is, and no one has pointed this out, is that: is it just me, or is that a little low and to the left?
    people have pointed out the distress the kid is under. believe me, thirtysomething soccer moms are worse. at least babies don’t try to argue that it’s possible to use even tinier jewelry on an initial nostril piercing.
    i have no beef with people piercing their infants. i won’t do it, but it’s because i hate kids. just get them done IN THE RIGHT SPOT for fuck’s sake. but when people like me say no, they wind up at the mall.

  18. j.c. @ PANGEA Avatar

    my point is, and no one has pointed this out, is that: is it just me, or is that a little low and to the left?
    people have pointed out the distress the kid is under. believe me, thirtysomething soccer moms are worse. at least babies don’t try to argue that it’s possible to use even tinier jewelry on an initial nostril piercing.
    i have no beef with people piercing their infants. i won’t do it, but it’s because i hate kids. just get them done IN THE RIGHT SPOT for fuck’s sake. but when people like me say no, they wind up at the mall.

  19. oppositronic Avatar
    oppositronic

    i wanna see some tattooed babies

  20. oppositronic Avatar
    oppositronic

    i wanna see some tattooed babies

  21. Bonnie Avatar

    I dont know if this has been said or not BUT, the pain lasts a fraction of a second on the initial piercing. What is the difference between that and getting immunized at the doctor? I hate watching little ones get their shots let alone babies getting ears peirced. thats my two cents on that part…

    I personally wouldnt pierce my daughters ears till she was old enough to ask for it and i knew she understood it would be kinda owwie for a little while… but yeah, I think its more of a personal conviction and choice of the parent to decide if they are going to wait till an age of understanding or doing it without consent.

  22. Bonnie Avatar

    I dont know if this has been said or not BUT, the pain lasts a fraction of a second on the initial piercing. What is the difference between that and getting immunized at the doctor? I hate watching little ones get their shots let alone babies getting ears peirced. thats my two cents on that part…

    I personally wouldnt pierce my daughters ears till she was old enough to ask for it and i knew she understood it would be kinda owwie for a little while… but yeah, I think its more of a personal conviction and choice of the parent to decide if they are going to wait till an age of understanding or doing it without consent.

  23. Jess Avatar
    Jess

    Ear piercing on children is up there with circumcision – don’t do it. It’s their body, leave it to them to make a choice to modify it when they’re of an age to make an informed decision. Ear piercing < < < genital modification in the grand scheme of things, but it’s still not right.

  24. Jess Avatar
    Jess

    Ear piercing on children is up there with circumcision – don’t do it. It’s their body, leave it to them to make a choice to modify it when they’re of an age to make an informed decision. Ear piercing < < < genital modification in the grand scheme of things, but it’s still not right.

  25. Mememanci Avatar
    Mememanci

    i see nothing wrong with it after all peeps circumsize some kids that don’t have a choice so i think ear piercing is way less tramatic than that if the kid don’t like it she can always decide to take it out when she gets older that simple

  26. Mememanci Avatar
    Mememanci

    i see nothing wrong with it after all peeps circumsize some kids that don’t have a choice so i think ear piercing is way less tramatic than that if the kid don’t like it she can always decide to take it out when she gets older that simple

  27. bt. Avatar
    bt.

    ALSO… i would like to comment on the “culture and open-mindedness” of modblog. if she were african and stabbing a massive bone through her child’s lip it would be “OOOH THAT IS THEIR CULTURE.” or cutting her daughter’s clit off. oh… wait i forgot white people can’t get away with doing things like that.

  28. bt. Avatar
    bt.

    ALSO… i would like to comment on the “culture and open-mindedness” of modblog. if she were african and stabbing a massive bone through her child’s lip it would be “OOOH THAT IS THEIR CULTURE.” or cutting her daughter’s clit off. oh… wait i forgot white people can’t get away with doing things like that.

  29. bt. Avatar
    bt.

    and… 105… you just rambled and said almost nothing coherent. intelligent words thrown together in an artistic witty order does nothing. get over your life.

  30. bt. Avatar
    bt.

    and… 105… you just rambled and said almost nothing coherent. intelligent words thrown together in an artistic witty order does nothing. get over your life.

  31. tyler Avatar
    tyler

    i dont really have a problem w/ babies getting an ear piercing, but i dont like that it is a “piercing gun”…i think it would be better if it was a professional piercer doin it…just my opinion tho…

  32. tyler Avatar
    tyler

    i dont really have a problem w/ babies getting an ear piercing, but i dont like that it is a “piercing gun”…i think it would be better if it was a professional piercer doin it…just my opinion tho…

  33. Vik Panda Avatar
    Vik Panda

    well, if babies should not get pierced what about male circumcision of babies? at least ear piercings are reversible. as for the pain and sad baby faces, i want you to think of your most painful moment. you remember it was painful, but you can’t remember the level of pain. you cant remember the first 2 years of your life nor the amount of pain of any painful memory, i doubt you’d remember you ears being pierced.

  34. Vik Panda Avatar
    Vik Panda

    well, if babies should not get pierced what about male circumcision of babies? at least ear piercings are reversible. as for the pain and sad baby faces, i want you to think of your most painful moment. you remember it was painful, but you can’t remember the level of pain. you cant remember the first 2 years of your life nor the amount of pain of any painful memory, i doubt you’d remember you ears being pierced.

  35. pending Avatar
    pending

    mothore – WHOA, what was that for? seriously.

  36. pending Avatar
    pending

    mothore – WHOA, what was that for? seriously.

  37. Boo Avatar
    Boo

    i wish my mom had pierced my ears when i was a baby. i didnt get them done till i was 12 and i messed with them and they got all infect =(
    i think i would wait till they were 2 or so and actually knew what was going on and i dont think i would take them to a loud, scary shop. i’ld have a friend come over and do it.
    i would want what i had to go thru happen to my kids

  38. Boo Avatar
    Boo

    i wish my mom had pierced my ears when i was a baby. i didnt get them done till i was 12 and i messed with them and they got all infect =(
    i think i would wait till they were 2 or so and actually knew what was going on and i dont think i would take them to a loud, scary shop. i’ld have a friend come over and do it.
    i would want what i had to go thru happen to my kids

  39. The Lizardman Avatar

    bt – go take ethics 101 and then try reading again for comphrehension. That post doesn’t ramble and is perfectly coherent – it is, in fact, taken from the standard syllabus of introductory discussions of ethics (a subject I once taught) which almost always reach the cultural relativism point very quickly and then stall – not unlike internet comment threads.

  40. The Lizardman Avatar

    bt – go take ethics 101 and then try reading again for comphrehension. That post doesn’t ramble and is perfectly coherent – it is, in fact, taken from the standard syllabus of introductory discussions of ethics (a subject I once taught) which almost always reach the cultural relativism point very quickly and then stall – not unlike internet comment threads.

  41. Jon P Avatar
    Jon P

    I don’t know why people keep linking this back to female circumcision in African cultures, or FGM, female genital mutilation.

    Anthropologists and anthropological theorists have spent years and years arguing over whether a strictly observant stance should be taken on FGM.

    Should anthropologists strictly document this practice and say nothing (bar their opinion once they’re writing it up in an ethnography), or should they say something about the brutality of the practice (you can’t argue it’s not brutal) to the people doing the “ritual”, should they try to educate the people about the pain a woman goes through once they’ve been infibulated, or the dirty rusty blunt razors used?

    Cultural relativism is a wonderful thing in my opinion, it’s a great tool for understanding why things were/are done in a particular place at a particular time. But there are times when harm is being done to someone, like a child without the ability to consent, that you’ve just gotta step the fuck up and say something.

    That’s a trendy fuckin’ store with cheap shit in the background. It’s a piercing gun for fucks sake. That child could’ve been pierced later in life in a much better way with their fuckin’ consent.

    The bitch has a crappy lil tattoo too, so she probably thinks she’s doing something great by giving her kid the gift of modification. It’s disgusting.

  42. Jon P Avatar
    Jon P

    I don’t know why people keep linking this back to female circumcision in African cultures, or FGM, female genital mutilation.

    Anthropologists and anthropological theorists have spent years and years arguing over whether a strictly observant stance should be taken on FGM.

    Should anthropologists strictly document this practice and say nothing (bar their opinion once they’re writing it up in an ethnography), or should they say something about the brutality of the practice (you can’t argue it’s not brutal) to the people doing the “ritual”, should they try to educate the people about the pain a woman goes through once they’ve been infibulated, or the dirty rusty blunt razors used?

    Cultural relativism is a wonderful thing in my opinion, it’s a great tool for understanding why things were/are done in a particular place at a particular time. But there are times when harm is being done to someone, like a child without the ability to consent, that you’ve just gotta step the fuck up and say something.

    That’s a trendy fuckin’ store with cheap shit in the background. It’s a piercing gun for fucks sake. That child could’ve been pierced later in life in a much better way with their fuckin’ consent.

    The bitch has a crappy lil tattoo too, so she probably thinks she’s doing something great by giving her kid the gift of modification. It’s disgusting.

  43. Tom V. Avatar
    Tom V.

    Can I just say that I love reading peoples comments on controvercial posts like this one. Keep arguing, its really interesting. If it goes this way, this post might outdo the first skullboy post in terms of comments!

  44. Tom V. Avatar
    Tom V.

    Can I just say that I love reading peoples comments on controvercial posts like this one. Keep arguing, its really interesting. If it goes this way, this post might outdo the first skullboy post in terms of comments!

  45. LoganRah Avatar
    LoganRah

    Excellent post from the lizardman. Tradition and culture can tell us whether something is considered right or wrong in that society but it doesn’t tell us whether it is MORALLY right or wrong (There is philosophical discussion on this but it would take a bit long to go into it here)

    For those of you saying the baby won’t remember the piercing and that makes it ok. Does that mean date rape with a drug that makes you forget the is experience ok?

    Obviously I’m objecting to the practice, since there is no benefit to the child and the chance for infection, bad placement etc. is unacceptable.

    And finally for those pointing out infant male circumcision, I’d say that is even worse than this and should not be practiced either, given that it causes severe discomfort, serves no medical purpose, and could cause problems for the child in the future (especially in areas where circumcision is not the norm, I know guys who have been teased because they were forcibly circumcised at birth)

  46. LoganRah Avatar
    LoganRah

    Excellent post from the lizardman. Tradition and culture can tell us whether something is considered right or wrong in that society but it doesn’t tell us whether it is MORALLY right or wrong (There is philosophical discussion on this but it would take a bit long to go into it here)

    For those of you saying the baby won’t remember the piercing and that makes it ok. Does that mean date rape with a drug that makes you forget the is experience ok?

    Obviously I’m objecting to the practice, since there is no benefit to the child and the chance for infection, bad placement etc. is unacceptable.

    And finally for those pointing out infant male circumcision, I’d say that is even worse than this and should not be practiced either, given that it causes severe discomfort, serves no medical purpose, and could cause problems for the child in the future (especially in areas where circumcision is not the norm, I know guys who have been teased because they were forcibly circumcised at birth)

  47. misslion Avatar

    I actually have a friend of mine with a baby that was advised by her physician to have her baby’s ears pierced at only 6 months old. His reasoning? They are less likely to “play” with them and get them infected by touching. I, personally, think this is ridiculous. But my friend went through with it anyway and had her baby’s ears pierced. Guess what? They got infected.

  48. misslion Avatar

    I actually have a friend of mine with a baby that was advised by her physician to have her baby’s ears pierced at only 6 months old. His reasoning? They are less likely to “play” with them and get them infected by touching. I, personally, think this is ridiculous. But my friend went through with it anyway and had her baby’s ears pierced. Guess what? They got infected.

  49. Jezibelle Avatar

    It really bothers me to see other mothers doing this to their children . It’s pretty easy to tell the baby is in pain. Doesn’t matter if it’s emotion, physical or both. I could NEVER do something like this to my daughter. She’s 3 and has started to ask about getting her ears pierced. As her mother I know that she isn’t ready for it (not to say that some 3y.o. aren’t). When you are someones parent you are suppose to look out for their well being and health.
    Also my mom is Mexican. I got my ears pierced when I was a day old. With a sewing needle no less. Harmful pointless cultural practices need to end. Tradition is no reason to carry on something like this.

  50. Jezibelle Avatar

    It really bothers me to see other mothers doing this to their children . It’s pretty easy to tell the baby is in pain. Doesn’t matter if it’s emotion, physical or both. I could NEVER do something like this to my daughter. She’s 3 and has started to ask about getting her ears pierced. As her mother I know that she isn’t ready for it (not to say that some 3y.o. aren’t). When you are someones parent you are suppose to look out for their well being and health.
    Also my mom is Mexican. I got my ears pierced when I was a day old. With a sewing needle no less. Harmful pointless cultural practices need to end. Tradition is no reason to carry on something like this.

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