One of the reasons that ear scalpeling first started getting done, is that when someone has their lobes pierced as a baby, it can grow up to be sitting quite low on the lobe both because it’s harder to do perfect placement on a tiny lobe and because the ear changes a little as it grows. As well as the issue of placement, there’s also the issue of consent — is it morally acceptable to modify someone else’s body without their permission, be it circumcision, piercing baby ears, or even coming of age tattooing and ritual ceremonies?
Then there’s also the counter-concern that many professionals face of “well, if I don’t do it, they’ll just go to the mall and have it done badly”… Personally I fall on the “don’t do it” side of the fence, but I can definitely understand why someone would come to the other conclusion. For example, Karla “Pinky” Grimes at No Regrets in Champaign, IL pierced the five week old baby on the left, and the little fellow on the right was done by Tarzan at Edu Tattoo Studio in Rio de Janeiro.
Comments
113 responses to “Piercing Babies”
My mom pierced my ears when I was only 6 weeks old… she did it before my dad got home from being on leave. In the Philippines I guess it’s common for baby girls to have their ears pierced. My dad said if he had been home he wouldn’t have let my mom do it.
She told me all she used was a candle & a sewing needle… yikes. They are a little crooked, but since I stretched them you can’t really tell anymore.
Even if my dad had stopped my mom, I’m sure I would’ve asked for them like crazy growing up anyways.
Redundant comment, but it makes me feel better:
My ears were pierced when I was a baby. No particular feelings about it. But now that my son is five months old, I can’t even imagine piercing before he can consent. He is not circumcised (to me it’s similar arguments culture, tradition, some kind of idea that it will assure gender-appropriate behavior), for the same reasons I can’t imagine piercing a baby:
So you’re there, holding your screaming baby, shushing it while inflicting (as far as the baby is concerned) LARGE amounts of unneccesary pain (remember, babies can feel pain, and since they have no experiences for comparison, the least pain is the absolute end of the world, plus they have nearly no self-directed coping mechanisms), just so you can have a fashionable baby? How does your brain let you do that?
I got my ears pierced when I was 8 after I asked my mom for it for about a year. My dad didnt want me to have them done at all but my mom took me to get them done at the mall (the only place to get pierced in those days) and they took about six months to heal. At least at that age I was able to understand how to clean them (in those days they told us to clean it with peroxide or something horrible like that thats probably why it took so long to heal) I had problems with my ear piercings for years before they were normal.
I do know some girls that have never had their ears pierced and never want them done even as an adult. If they were pierced as babys then they wouldnt be able to make that choice. So if I have kids I will wait until they ask for their ears pierced and they are old enough to know how to take care of them properly. I would probably help them clean them but how easy is it for a kid to not touch their ears with dirty fingers! Does anyone really think a toddler or a baby would know not to get bacteria into a fresh piercing? So in a way it kind of seems dangerous to pierce someone ears at so young.
The piercing shop I go to will only pierce a kid’s ears if they can ask for it themselves.
Been pierced since I was days old. They did it right the first time. No need for do-overs. Probably the only thing they did well in Commie Cuba.
and p.s. there are no emotional and psychological scars for the %$*&(# of #$*(. No. big. deal.
I will definitely leave that choice up to my child. That should be no ones choice except a personal one. I would never push what I feel is fashionable on a child.
not a big deal. people need to chill out, it’s a tiny hole in a fleshy lobe and doesn’t hurt that much. kids heal much faster anyway.
im on the dont do it side….. just wait till they ask or the the age cut off at the shop you go to
I am not going to read through all of these posts for the simple fact that I am quite positive that one or two will piss me right off (and I am not really in the mood for that right now). I will however add my 2 cents…
I view piercing the ears (or any other manner of altering the body) of someone that did not ask for it to be done should be a criminal offense. As adults we choose to “mutilate” our bodies with different piercings and tattoos, but we make that choice with the knowledge of all the effects socially and physically. A child, especially a baby, does not know that still growing bodies should not be altered. Having your baby’s ears pierced just so you can look at her and say “aren’t those just darling”, or thinking other people around you will like you better because your baby girl has such pretty earrings, disgusts me. As for an age that piercings should be allowed I don’t know, at least wait until they are done growing, that would be a good start. Perhaps when they can demonstrate that they know the effects of the choices they make, be they negative or positive. As an adult I would not choose to have my foreskin removed, but I cannot make that choice because it was made for me when I was a baby. Part of my penis was removed essentially because some Doctors in the 40′s were real good at hiding the fact they were doing it, and promoting it, to make boys not want to play with themselves with the myth of sanitation/hygiene. So yeah, I really don’t see any difference between beating your child and piercing their ears, it’s all a form of abuse…
I do not use the word mutilate in a bad way, so don’t get in a tizzy for a harmless little word. I use that word, because that IS what we are doing when we pierce, stretch, scar, brand, and tattoo our bodies.
mu•ti•late (myōōt’l-āt’):
1. To deprive of a limb or an essential part; cripple.
2. To disfigure by damaging irreparably
3. To make imperfect by excising or altering parts.
#6: Sadly some parents do it so that people [strangers] can tell their baby girl is a girl not a boy. Stupid, I know but it’s the only excuse I’ve heard.
That erks me. I HATE seeing babies with earrings. Its just not necessary. Theres no need to ‘doll’ a baby up with things like that. Ugh.
The pain of a piercing is no less intense because it is being felt by an infant. My freshman year at college, I worked at a mall in a bath and beauty store right next to a Claire’s. I watched several babies getting their ears pierced and it was heartbreaking to hear them scream afterwards. After a few minutes of hysterical crying, all of the babies would pass out, dead to world. Once I overheard a woman say, “It must not have hurt that bad, if she’s sleeping now.” She didn’t realize that her baby had gone into shock…
I had my ears pierced when i was 3 months old. i lucked out – perfectly even, no problems.
my mom’s reason was – i was too young to know i had ears yet, so i wasn’t going to mess with them and get them infected like i might have if i had gotten them when i was older. this way, she could take care of the holes and heal them properly.
i agree. i will totally do it if i have a daughter.
#47- my first child cried at birth- she was born in a hospital with the lights and cold and doctor who held her before I did- I had four more children after my eldest- none cried at birth-
the one’s who were born underwater never even opened their eyes for hours. You will find most c-section babies cry at birth.
I hope most parents give their children tools to allow them to cope with pain in life- but I also hope most parents as a rule try to prevent inflicting pain on their children.
A baby wouldn’t remember missing a meal or two, left in crappy diapers for hours- being dropped on their head- there are so many things babies wouldn’t remember that we still avoid…life long trauma or not.
that sounds argumentative of me(the birth stuff).. sorry it wasn’t meant to be- more just a personal insight.
My ears were pierced by the nurse before I went home. I really have no problem with it (as in I don’t mind it having been done to me), I just don’t like that now they’re uneven and sit too high. Growing up I never had a problem with it, except for a point in my childhood when I really did hate wearing earrings just to be “pretty,” so I just didn’t wear them and the holes got really small, but I still have the same ones and can still wear earrings in them. All in all, it was never traumatic for me. When I wanted to wear earrings, cool, when I didn’t, it was like the holes were never even there, so cool. Just my experience though.
Me and my sister both had our ears pierced at about 6 years old, probably a good year or so of nagging before our mum actually agreed to let us get them pierced. So we got them done for our birthday at a chemist. They were pierced with a gun, mine turning out rather uneven – my right up higher and the left lower, it’s rather noticable so as I got older I never wore earrings in them, only now that I have started stretching them it’s less noticable. But I am glad I got the choice to have them done, instead of them being done when I was only a few weeks old. When I have children I will do the same thing – wait until they ask me.
I’m happy parents are taking there infants to professionals INSTEAD of letting their great-aunts do it.
They pierced my ears when I was 4 years old cause grandma bought rings for my birthday and they needed holes to be put in. I remember screaming at the top of my lungs, the gun thing was scary-looking. I don’t remember it hurting though. I still have the holes, they don’t close up, luckily for me.
I find ear piercings to be something very mundane, I don’t see why it’s a big deal if there’s two holes in your ears when you grow up. Maybe I just got used to it.
Thats the reason why we only pierce earlobes with children from age 4 and only if the kids themselve tell us that they want it super bad…
(although i would rather have them being older.. but hea.. i rather have my piercer do it then the parents themselve with a warm needle or worse the compitition that still uses a piercing gun (NOOOOOOOOO……) it’s a moral choose)
Personally I think someone has to decide themselves if the person want to mod his her body and not their parents. I think at least 6 years for ear piercings is an absolute minimum.
#64 wow I thought all babies cried!
I just couldn’t imagine being sqeezed out.
It’s deffinatley damaging to do all those things to babies.
To do those things to anyone.
I had my daughters ears done when she was 3 months old. They did it with guns,2 ppl did both ears at the same time. That was 9 yrs ago. Knowing what I know now I wouldn’t have had them done with guns. They healed fine and we’ve had no problems with them.
I was going to make my daughter wait until she was 12. Well, a few years back when she was 8 she went to the grandparents over Christmas and came back with her ears pierced. I wasn’t even asked if I wanted her ears pierced, she told grandma she wanted them and grandma took her to the mall. They came out ok in placement but she got bumps on the back that have finally settled down. Then about a year ago she got the itch again and this time my ex took her to the mall behind my back to get her cartilage done! Bumps on the back again, but otherwise ok now. What gets me the most, is I didn’t have other options – piercing shops won’t even pierce ears here until the kids are 12! Since then she has taken up self piercing her ears with better results.
ever since i can remember, i really wanted earrings! i got them in a mall right before i turned 4…i loved them!!!no complications…no crookedness, nothing! a few years later i wanted more holes, so my older sister pierced my second ones when i was around 8-10. a while after that, i helped pierce a babys ears. she was only 1 year old, but she didnt cry at all! she was great with them and as soon as she was old enough to talk, she would show off her little gold earrings to everyone.
this all goes to say that there are definitely much crueler things than piercing a babys ears, most to them will be glad for it, as soon as they are old enough to realize.
For those of you who find it disgusting and “unnecessary”, I think you’re being a bit ethnocentric. Who are you to judge what’s necessary and not? My godmother pierced my ears when I was two weeks old. All the girls on my dad’s side got theirs done where they were newbs, too. It’s a part of our culture and I love it. I wouldn’t change that for anything. I’ll do it to my children, and if they decide they don’t like it when they’re older, then oh well. They can take the earrings out.
Also, mine are AMAZINGLY even, and I’ve got AMAZINGLY thick lobes.
#76 I am not sure what country you were born in or what culture you were raised in, but in the United States and Canada, infant ear piercing is not an ingrained cultural practice. However, even assuming that it was a culturally significant rite of passage, it is not ethnocentric to speak out against the practices of one’s own culture, which is what I was doing.
Further, it does not necessarily imply ethnocentrism to voice criticism of another culture. What you are advocating is cultural relativism, which is different than simply being anti-ethnocentric. Cultural relativism implies that all cultural practices are equally valid and should only be judged by the moral criteria of that particular culture.
You write, “Who are you to judge what’s necessary and not?” By that logic than a person has no right to speak out against female genital mutilation, dowry deaths, etc, etc because it is part of a different culture. Clearly, it is a dangerous logic.
Last, you fail to address the most important issue, that an infant has no ability to consent, either to the modification itself or the pain that accompanies it.
#76, you made a good point. If this were a pic of a native child from Africa or South America or Asia (or take your pick) with a pierced nose or ears…perhaps with some organic material or not…I wonder if the comments would be more postive?
I am sorry, but I find it incredibly disrespectful that some people here are bashing the tradition that is a part of some cultures to have a babies ears pierced. Just because it is not a part of the tradition from your culture does not give you the right to disrespect it. My father’s side of the family is Hispanic. My little sister, all of my cousins who are female, my aunts, my grandmother, and I all had our ears pierced as babies. This is something that makes me feel closer to my family. If I have a girl then I will have her ears pierced as a baby. You can disagree with me, but it is still a part of my families’ tradition and I am going to do it no matter how many times someone says that it is ethically wrong.
I just can’t understand why piercing ears is such a big deal to people yet circumcision isn’t.
Informed consent is the name of the game here. If it were my kid, I’d wait until they were old enough to ask for it and make sure they knew what they were getting into.
Circumcision is sort of a different game, as it’s much harder to regrow a foreskin than it is to take out a pair of earrings.
Fundamentally altering the function of your child’s genitalia ≠ poking holes in their ears.
Esther, I was born in California and raised both here, in northern California, and Mexico. I was not targetting you in my response.
I don’t see anything wrong in stating facts about another’s culture, but criticizing brings in a very negative connotation with a side of self-righteousness, considering you’re most likely basing your critiques off of your own culture.
If it’s your culture, and you have a problem with it, then speak out. If it’s someone else’s deal, then shut it. (Or at least be fair. If you speak out about female genital mutilation, do you also speak out about breast augmentation? How about copper coils used to elongate necks? Chinese foot binding?)
I did sort of address the issue of consent. I said they can take the earrings out. I’ve never met anyone upset by their parents’ choices in that regard.
I’ve been present for a few piercings, and not all babies cry. I have a video of mine and I didn’t. Maybe a lot of the babies were crying from the noise of the gun? I’ve never been pierced by one, but I’m assuming they make a sound.
I think you can educate yourself about cultural rituals and still form a valid opinion if you are outside the culture.
THE BABY ON THE RIGHT REMINDS ME OF E.T
BUT THEYRE MANY BABIES LOOKIN LIKE E.T
Natalie-
Your whole argument seems to be based off of the idea that all criticism is inherently flawed because it is based off of one’s own cutural experience. Everyone DOES has a cultural bias, however, bias can be acknowledged and overcome. If this were not the case, then the disciplines of anthropology and sociology would be rather meaningless.
Obviously it is important to understand that no culture is inherently better or worse than another. I agree with you there. I also agree with you that Western culture has a very unfortunate tradition of judging other cultures inferior when held up to Western moral standards (I am of Alaska Native descent so I have firsthand experience with this).
However, the idea that no person has the right to criticize a practice if it occurs outside of one’s own culture, is not only flawed, it is dangerous. Do you honestly believe that female genital mutilation is morally permissible, so long as it is culturally mandated? I find that hard to believe.
You asked if I opposed foot binding, neck elongation, or breast augmentation? And the answer is no, if they are performed on consenting individuals who are aware of what they are doing to their bodies. Just as I am not opposed to labia or clitoris removal or genital stitching, in and of itself. The issue is informed consent. Which brings us back to the original topic…
A baby is inherently incapable of consenting to a piercing. The fact that it can later be removed does not change this. And the suggestion that an infant who gets pierced might not experience pain is pretty silly.
Although those practices are consented, most women do it because they feel obliged to. They don’t agree to get their genitals mutilated because they want to, but rather because if they don’t, they won’t find a husband in their society, which they view as far worse. There is a culture in Africa that, when a woman becomes engaged, has to gain over a hundred pounds to be considered beautiful by her future husband and an adequate wife. They drink all the milk and such without argue, but they all stated that although they agreed to go through with it, they hated it because all the added weight gave them health problems, back pain, etc. Yes, they consented to it, but out of cultural pressure, so it still isn’t really a pure form of consent. It’s a bit like peer pressure, if you will (although obviously still a different matter). Just because they consent to it doesn’t mean that somewhere deep down they aren’t raging against it. For them it’s a matter of choosing comfort, or a husband. Also, for most of these practices, it is done when the females are still young girls and don’t have much of a say in their life, whether they want to or not. It’s a familial responsibility they feel obliged to.
On the one hand, I agree with #64 that ear piercings are mundane. Having personally gone through this myself, there was a point in my life where I just refused to were earrings. Like I said in my previous post, the holes just shrunk a lot and if I don’t wear earrings, it’s like they’re not even there, so it really wasn’t a big deal for me. On the other hand, I also agree that it’s unnecessary to put an infant through the pain, no matter how short lived, just to be pretty, especially since there are many styles of earrings that don’t require piercings. Who knows, just because I was ok with it, doesn’t mean that some other individual will be too.
it’s earring piercings. stop lumping in all the other crap with it. if the kid doesn’t want it later, they can let it close up.
Like many here, I too had my earlobes pierced as a baby – I believe at around 10 months old. I can’t say much about it, I always liked them growing up, and around me it was completely uncommon for a young girl to have her ears pierced.
That said, I agree with those here that are saying that five weeks is just too young, and these mothers are compromising their babies’ immune systems unnecessarily. I wouldn’t go so far as to call it child abuse, in my opinion, but it certainly isn’t good judgement.
as a mother of a 7 year old daughter and being 21 weeks pregnant, i give a wholehearted NO on this subject.
maybe living in a town full of chavs with toddlers with hooped earrings (seriously, how stupid does a parent need to be? thats not an accident waiting to happen is it!) and dummies permanently glued in their mouths, maybe i’m biased, but my daughter wont be getting pierced ears til she asks for them. it really offends me when i go to claires accessories (for example) and i see another mother willing to put their baby through pain for aesthetic purposes. it really disgusts me.
I am curious if anyone arguing on the side of “tradition” or culture can share what the meaning behind the tradition is?
I am also wondering- in countries where it is the cultural *norm* to pierce an infant- how is it done?
guns.. trained piercers?
simply put, if theres no consent, its cruel.
i don’t care how old the kid is.
its mutilation to do that to any unwilling child.
i had my ears pierced as a toddler at the mall with a nasty gun. disgusting, and traumatic. turns out, i’m allergic to nickel, which caused irritation for years. to make it worse mum still insisted on me wearing jewelry in them. as a teen it was the deciding factor in stretching them. i had to reclaim my ears for myself, and with jewelry that wouldn’t irritate the living hell out of them 😉
I got my first earrings in the age of 2 months.
And I don’t remember it. Today I’m Happy about it because I know, that I began to let me pierce early enough. 😀
I got my ears pierced when I was 1 or 2 years (can’t remember for sure). It’s sort of tradition in my country, and honestly I couldn’t be happier! To this day they still have the best placement, and they never got infected or gave my any trouble.
I got my ears pierced at the hospital when i was born as most girls in my country did. It was almost 30 years ago and i’m pretty sure they are not piercing babies at hospital anymore. But still, is unusual to see a baby girl without her earrings. Nowadays most mothers get their babies pierced at pharmacies or at home.
Here in Spain is something you don’t really think about, you are a girl you wear earrings. I don’t feel abused because of this but i don’t think i would pierce someone without his permission.
I had mine pierced with a needle by my aunt when I was about 6 mos. old. I really think babies and young children should not be pierced until they are sure they really want it, and can understand the importance of aftercare. Babies are WAY too young to understand what’s going on, and what’s to stop them from playing with them? Also, it’s without their consent.
I have to agree with Shannon no one should be modified without their consent. It burns me up when I see a baby girl who has her ears pierced or a male without a foreskin because you know they had no say. Though I know of adult males who have decided to be circumcised but at least they were able to make their own decision. I still don’t understand what the problem is to allow someone to make up their own mind. Especially with circumcision the false health claims or religious stupidity force someone into a position they may not want to be in.
I’ve never really been able to get all up in arms about this informed consent thing. I UNDERSTAND the concept perfectly, I get it, but my brain just short circuits when you throw “ear piercing” into the sentence along with it. If my ears had been pierced with a needle by a professional piercer when I was a baby, I wouldn’t care now. But if it was with a gun, unevenly, by an idiot wielding a week of Claire’s training, I’d be cranky about it. I just… well, I just don’t care. Which I know people think is a cop-out answer, but that’s really all there is to it. It may be heartless to inflict pain on an unwilling baby, but it’s just not a concern for me, it’s just something that’s so ingrained in my head as something baby girls get done.
my ears were pierced when i was 9 months old.in all of my baby photos i’m wearing amazing little gold hoops.it’s totally a tradition thing.
A can’t remember when I first got my ears pierced, but I remember that I asked for them! I would’ve been gutted if someone pierced my ears without knowing that I wanted them.
I think that a child should only be able to get piercings when they ask for them, whatever that age may be. If they can ask for ‘em, and look after ‘em, fine!
my parents got my ears pierced when i was 10 weeks old because its what gran parents wanted also my cousins were being looked after by my gran and got returned to my auntie with them done.
after having to wear earings for so long when i had the option and some self control over it then i chose not to wear anything in my ears for 4 years.
because i had my ears pierced when i was so young they are now pierced to high to stretch.
i dont persolly think its right to do it to children because it should be there choice.