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Cyansea and the Good Things in Me

This experience is about my bear paw (part one) and bear scarification (part two). For your convenience I've arranged the experience in a few smaller sections to make reading it easier. Choose a section: Why a scar? Designing the scar, motives Peeling, part one Healing up, part one Peeling, part two Healing up, part two Conclusion Why? I had been thinking about getting a scarification piece done for a while, but to be honest I always preferred tattoos. Especially since I have very light skin and I doubt a white scar on nearly white skin will show much. But then ... read more

As the blade touches my skin

For the longest time I had been in search of the perfect body mod for me. I've been doing piercing for quite a while now, teaching myself through trial and error. It all started a few years ago with a safety pin, and testing my limits of pain. I eventually worked my way up from doing friends' cartilage piercings, to tongues, bellybuttons, nipples, and even a few genital piercings. However, I don't look like the stereotypical body mod type. The only remaining piercings I have are my eyebrow, 00g lobes, and my Prince Albert. I'm quite happy with all of ... read more

My Chest Cutting

My Chest Cutting Dec. 31st 2003. It's New Years Eve, and all I could think about, at least for the past month was, scarification! I had just turned 18 the 18th of Dec, and was determined to acquire a beautiful scarification design on my stomach. Matt, my boyfriend, was set to get his conches punched as well (at 2's). So once Dec. 31st came, we were off. That was the most nerve raking 3 hour drive we both have ever made, but when we arrived Jeff broke me the news that his scalpels had not arrived yet so he wouldn't ... read more

Straight Edge In Your Face!! If I were to punch you that is.

Disclaimer: Do not try anything you read that I have done in this experience unless you have the proper sterilized equipment. Even still I recommend getting it done professionally. The idea for this actually came to me in the summer when I was at a show. I had drawn big black X's on my hands as a lot of straight edge kids do, but, I had also drawn three X's in between my knuckles on my right hand. The X's on my hands had almost completely worn off after sweating quite heavily from the mosh, but the ones on my ... read more

My Star Brand

I have wanted some sort of scar for a long time. My only set back was that I was not sure what I wanted and where I wanted it. I needed it some place where I could hide it just in case. After reading many stories about branding on BMEzine, I decided to do a star on the inside of my left wrist. I am ambidextrous, but I tend to favor my right hand so I figured my star would turn out better, plus I always wear a watch on the wrist so it would be easy to hide. I ... read more

My first Carving!

In June of 2003, my friend came over showing me this awesome design she made on her ankle. She told me she did it with her eyebrow razor and it didn't hurt. When she left that day I thought it might be a good idea to experiment with that before I set my mind on getting a tattoo. After all if I didn't cut deep it wouldn't stay long. So when no one was home, I got out some peroxide, alcohol and my eyebrow razor. I thought about where I wanted it so it wouldn't be noticeable to anyone's view. ... read more

Overreaction is my only reaction

I'm only 17. But that never stopped me from finding weird ways of expressing my great inner illness of hypersensitivity. This overreaction that practically devoured me is the main reason for which i find myself in the position of being considered different because instead of shouting or hitting someone when angry or sad, I'd rather cut myself. The first time I ever put a sharpened object on my skin is dedicated to a fight between my parents, a long time ago when I was only 12 or so. Back then I started noticing that if i caused physical pain to ... read more

Grinding Off The Flesh!

Scarification is such a beautiful thing. A lot of people don't understand why I chose to do this to myself - in fact they think that it's a sin and that you're just destroying your body. I decided to do this about half a year ago, and it took me a long time to finally decide on what to place on my upper chest. It was also a decision I didn't take lightly. There were also many options as to how I would have my scarification piece applied. I researched the different ways one could be scarred. I thought that ... read more


I had a back piece done by John at Scarab Body Arts in Syracuse, NY. I thought it would be a good time to write an experience about it since most experiences are written right after they are done. Mine has had a year to heal and settle. I had my first cutting done by John in Sept of 2003. I knew after that experience that there would never be another artist I would go to. In fact the story is here on BME in the archives. Anyways, I decided I wanted something to accentuate my back. A cutting that ... read more


*Warning* Please don't cut a design on yourself...let the professionals do it for you! Doing it yourself could be unsanitary...open wounds can get infected very easily!! I really do not know where to start, because my story is not really about getting my scarring done in a studio. I used to be a cutter, and I guess you could say I still am, but after 2 years of cutting off and on, I realized something that at the time made no sense to me. I got upset when the scars faded. I started cutting when I was 16, but I ... read more

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