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Betta Fish Etching

When my best friend handed me the scrap sheet of paper she had hastily (and drunkenly) sketched about a dozen little betta fish all over I immediately saw something right in the center of the page that caught my eye. A small betta fish (also commonly known as Japanese fighting fish) outline, with an odd little star scribbled right in the center. I'm normally someone who thinking for months before getting a modification, especially a permanent one. I agonize over the pros and cons, and research the aftercare making sure I understand as many of the possible issues I might ... read more

A wierd way to start.

I made the mistake of joining a fraternity in college. I hadn't done anything of note in high school, and yet I somehow ended up joining the crazy frat who seemed more like a criminal organization. While I don't really think that was the best choice I ever made, I did end up with one positive thing. I love my brand. I had wanted it for a while. A few of the brothers had them, all of whom were older. It was not a common practice, just something for the crazies. I wasn't one of them, so I understand that ... read more

my "blind faith"

I will make my experience writing fairly short in order to get most of what I think should be know out. At least, that's the goal here. . . For about 2 years now I've had a growing interest with branding, and since I've been working in tattoo shops it seems to be a re-occurring subject of conversation, mostly between myself and my ex-piercer, but none the less as subject of debate. Cautery vs. Strike, I was always on the side of cautery, personally. For reasons I wont get into now, but should be discussed with your artist if you ... read more

Less Skin, but More Love

For two years, I dated a guy who I thought would be my future husband. Call me naive for it, but I honestly thought that he completed me. After a few tough breakups, we finally called it quits, leaving me nostalgic for the past. It seemed that the two years we spent together were unfortunately also two very pivotal years in my life--I lost my virginity, I graduated high school, I started college, I started experimenting with marijuana, I started drinking again, I began some excellent friendships, and my mental/emotional health was higher than ever. It was turbulent to say ... read more

Spiral Out

I'm a reformed self injurer. Sort of. I started hurting myself before I can remember. For most of my life it was little things. Hitting walls until my hand stung and went numb. Bashing my head against a wall. Biting my lips and tongue til they bled. Pinching myself. It escalated in my teens – I'd sew my fingers together with needles and thread. Pick at my skin until it bled. Push my body to it's limits. Finally, when I was in my late teens I graduated to cutting. A late bloomer so to speak – I was living away ... read more

A memorable cut of life

As a sixteen year old I was fascinated with cutting myself. Many of the scars that I gave myself were hidden under pants or long sleeved shirts. I was terrified that one of my friends, or even worse, a parent might find out that I was doing this to myself. Eventually my parents did find out, and there was hell to pay. They took me to all of the best doctors and psychiatrists. I was on antidepressants, anti-anxiety meds, and sleeping pills...searching for a cure. Yet, no way to live. I had never heard of anyone wanting to hurt themselves ... read more

My Rabbit Hole

As I sit here, I am looking at pictures of myself when I was younger. Blond, anorexic, and strung out on drugs. I was a weak minded, ignorant, and sheltered individual. From what people have told me, and from my own insight, I can see that I have changed drastically from then. I wonder, when exactly did I begin this journey down this never ending rabbit hole of pain and limits? When did I truly turn around my whole life in order to find myself? Oh, I remember now, my journey all started with and Exacto knife... turmoil and a ... read more

"hor" and "xxhed"

I have had a number of scarification experiences over the past couple of years, all of which I performed myself at home. My motivation is not some sort of emo self-hatred or teenage angst. I believe that the human body is beautiful, and I am an artist in many realms, my favorite canvas being myself. In addition to piercings, I have found scarification to be quite satisfying, especially since the scars produced are not instant, but require some patience and planning. Once everything heals, I always have a healthy sense of accomplishment and pride. Since I have not had access ... read more

I Love My Arm

I am not entirely sure if my story will fit in with this site, since everything on my body, from piercings to scars, were done either by me or one of my friends. Since I've never been to any body modification sites until recently, and I don't quite have the terms down yet, but here goes. When I was younger (let's not specify age or anything) I was pretty screwed up, and for some reason or another, I began cutting because it helped me feel better about whatever situation I found myself in. After a while, I began to get ... read more

ahora Solo deseo que todo esté bien, mi escarificación y skin removal...

Creo que ya había estado esperando mucho tiempo por esto. Pero finalmente sucedió, así de repente, la persona, el lugar, el momento físico y emocional perfectos, se dieron. Cuando Ya de a poco estaba sintiendome cansada de no sentir nada, y volviendo a entrar en unas de esas rutinas tediosas en que la vida y el sistema de hoy te envuelven fácilmente. No podría haber sido mejor. Creo que la escarificación es algo altamente personal, y una forma muy hermosa de capturar sentimientos, recuerdos, pensamientos y sueños (sean buenos o malos, es personal). Creo que es una formar de perder ... read more

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