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I scream you scream...we all scream for piercing.

This morning started at seven o'clock. I usually go to sleep around sunrise so to say that a morning started only one hour after my usual bedtime lets you read into just how tired I must be at 4:01 am as I type this experience, the day was stressful and tiring to say the very least. I awoke to the clatter of my mind. My medication was having an adverse affect in my sick and malnourished body, so the effect was exceptional. As the day progressed my Paranoia grew and my Anxiety peaked and fell. The day wound on like a toy with too tight a spring; oversped but still lasting too long. I was spending time at my friends house this whole weekend, in whose bed I awoke this morning, and she had a friend of hers over. The day went over without much abrasion. As the night wore on we picked up another friend of hers and we were all hanging out at her house; thus we have supplied a setting.

The day was so utterly stressful and tense because of all this picking up, dropping off, time scheduling, working plans, departing, arriving, paying too much for gas and all of those ordeals of daily life. But for some reason my brain was not letting me deal with anything, it wasn't accepting the way the world turned, everything was too close, or too far away. I don't just mean that I was irritated, as in waking up on the wrong side of the bed, I mean literally distressed, panicked, truly terrorized. I knew then, at four pm that I needed body modification to get through the day. I began pleading with all of my friends to let me pierce something, let me work on them in some way, let me alter them, inflict, create, I suppose I wanted to torture them in some way to throw some of my pain at them like some kind of card dealer.

After a few hours of my pleading and such, my closest friend gave in. I pierced two sideways needles into her arm, but she then decided that she wanted to hunt for some blood to play with. So I poked the little sixteen gauge needle around for a few minutes and then we got a good draw, we filled a twelve ounce cup with blood and then she was satisfied. I was not.

I asked yet another friend if they wanted anything and she agreed to let me pierce her ear, but I was not satisfied with the standard middle lobe thingie she wanted and persuaded her to do a very low orbital. We began the whole process I sat her down sterilized her and prepped her for the process. This little one is a nervous wreck and absolutely jumpy. So I decided no freehanding, I clamped her and told her to sit still. I started her on the breathing like I do with all my clients that get like this, 1...Breathe in; 2...Breathe out; 3...Breathe in; then as they exhale I push it slowly through. it went through just fine and she was fine, then came the next hole. I marked it off with the ring in and clamped her again. Same breathing and it went right through. Then came the hard part, fixing a bead on an orbital is never easy for me I always overthink it. (perhaps practice was good today then huh?) After a moment of her wincing a bit, the ball went on and all was well.

Now, after everybody watched her go through it, they all wanted piercings. So I looked in "me mini piercing kit" and noticed no jewelry, just play needles. I brought this point up. After long debate it was decided that I would begin with the designing shapes on people arms and chests with needles. Thus ensued more play piercing than I have ever done in my life, and since I am the piercer in the group I was the only one piercing, I was in heaven.

It began winding down as people started feeling woozy. I stopped the whole commotion and began handing out juice and cookies (vegan of course) to the whole group, and within moments of course everybody felt better. I began securing the needles into my mini sharps container, and cleaning up the numerous gloves and alcohol swabs and bacitracin packets. I then realized that I had yet to put a needle in myself. The last time I attempted piercing myself was my navel and it was especially difficult and lasted well over half an hour just to insert the needle. The thought of attempting it again seemed so easy. I gathered up another needle and cleaned my chest off, placed the sharp head against my skin, I inserted the full of the bevel into me. But it wouldn't go through the rest of the way. My arm simply wouldn't push it anymore, the pain was minimal, the skin was supple and sot enough to let a needle through. The arm was just neutralized. Stopped by nervous reaction. I removed th e needle in defeat. It was so irritating to look down at the bleeding hole that it left, knowing that my brain was scared away from the act by my body's nerves. My body beat my mind. I hated it. So I braced my lip to my teeth, gripped the needle again and gently softly eased the needle through me. it went in and out clean, perfect, beautiful. I had won.

I gazed around the room at the three other holding tissues to bleeding wounds, cleaning blood softly from their arms and chests, pressing Band-Aids to their skin and I smiled, the stress was gone. The hate that was welling in me was gone. The pain that I was about to release on myself in my next depression was gone, in an hour of bloody bodily expression. Soulful connection to the body had proven that four bored hateful humans could smile at their pain, and revel in their bodies alteration. What a wonderful night.

Now then, I am a well learned human, I know anatomy very well, I used clean implements, I used fresh sterile equipment, fresh one time use needles. Do not try this on any old body part with any old needle, if you pop the wrong place you will regret it a lot. Blood cleans very slowly off carpet kids, don't be stupid.


submitted by: Anonymous
on: 20 March 2003
in Ritual

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Artist: Ben+Zabriskie
Studio: Home+Studio
Location: Orange%2C+California

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