have been interested in body art since I was a child, it's been a thought process every day since I can remember, so I don't know when exactly it all began. I was pierced about ten years before I had seen anyone else doing it. (I pierced my nose) I was about fourteen and live in a very... fuckit, a very uptight community!
I tattoed myself when I was fourteen but was not happy with it, so I waited til I was legal and got my first good one. For eleven years I've been collecting art, lots of beautiful ink and some fairly tame piercings, for now. About six years ago I went to the doctor with a lump under my arm and one in my throat. This is it, I'm dead, I've seen Terms of Endearment, I'm dead! Well, I was 24 or 25 and the doctor, and chief dickhead at our tiny hospital, didn't even look at it, just laughed at me and told me to come back when I was all grown up... So I left thinking I was dead, but totally embarrassed and afraid of the same happening again, much worse than getting it fixed, right?! Well, it disappeared. For six years.
Now I have a family, and much less tolerance for dickheads that take one look at a tattoo and think I must be the nutcase..The lump had come back, and now it was the size of a brussel sprout, and I couldn't sleep, couldn't think straight. So I made an appointment with a "lump" Dr. Told him I found it about five months earlier, and was afraid to come in, afraid of my kids alone, my husband having to take it all on... Afraid. He smiled, never once giving me those weird sideways glances we of the kindred and adorned tribe know so well, and said lets take a look. Well I just about fell on the floor when he felt it, because everything changed, his eyes lost their soft understanding, his attitude bacame rushed, serious. " I think I'd like to get you to a bigger hospital, can you get off island tomorrow?" Needless to say, I paniced, freaked my man out...the whole thing.
We went, they made me take out oh, lets see, I didn't have the nipple done yet...um, 12? I think it was 12 piercings, and what fun! My ass hanging out of the johnny off of the gurney, my life in the hands of the masked avenger in blue... In we went, and me being the "enigma" as they called me, (sorry Man, I worship at your alter, but it's what they called me) I wanted to be awake while they took a golf ball out of my pit, and enough surrounding tissue to do a biopsy in case it spread...
Whatever they gave me was supposed to block memory, but I had a blast! The anesthesiologist (can't spell it!) was a cool looking man, HUGE! looked like a wrestler, bald, we chatted about my ink and stuff while they dug in, I remember him, the nurse, the conversation, everything, but I had no idea they were in my body...weird. About a half hour and the Dr. says, "Okay, we're just gonna sew you up, and the results will be in in just a few minutes.." So we hung out. All these curious people wanting to know about body art, the "fascination", I asked what theirs was... bla bla bla. Then a nurse came in, and the Dr. excused himself from the conversation to confer...The longest five minutes I can remember. When he came back I asked him to take the mask off while he basically sealed my fate, and was surprised to find him grinning at me, looking like, I don't know, like he had just heard something peculiar and wasn't really sure he believed it.
"Well Mrs. Blabla, it's benign. And it's blue." First, relief. Total, retarded 7 year old silly ass relief. Then I was curious, as were the minion of masked folk standing around me. The doctor said that it was rare, and he had never personally seen it, but that the left axillary limph node they had removed was full of ink. That it must have filtered out the other pigment and stored the blue (most of my tattooes are black and grey...?) until it became noticeable...I wanted to see it! I wanted to take it home and put it on my shelf! It was a big lumpy thing, and it was blueish...but they kept it and I was so damn happy to be okay, fuckit, at that point they could have taken out the other one and kept the set!
So there it is, and am I afraid to get more ink? Hell no! I plan on being a very colorful old bag some day, with nipple rings I can tuck into my robe!
Thanks for the opportunity to share, I live on an island, and there are VERY few of us here, shopping and PTA, I don't know who fears it more, me or them, and I think my art is still very basic and not near as exciting as some, but I have many years and a vivid imagination, and isn't that all one really needs?
submitted by: Anonymous
on: 01 Feb. 1998