Popped the ink cherry
Saturday the 27th of March, 2010 - Probably one of the happiest days of my life. I've never felt so anxious, nervous, nauseous, happy or excited, ever. To be one hundred per cent honest, I was completely shitting myself. Since I was underage, I had to have my mother with me, for permission. She has 5 tattoos, so I trusted her judgment when it came to the extent of the pain. But, of course, being the strange & cruel person she is, she decided to absolutely freak me out by exaggerating the feeling of getting a tattoo.
"The shading felt like he was just dragging a hot butcher's knife, up and down." Standing in the studio, waiting ever so patiently, I felt like vomiting. Never have I ever been so nervous that I felt like puking. This was a day for many firsts. I'm pretty sure everybody in the room was chuckling behind my back, but, whatevs.
My 'appointment' (well, it wasn't really an app. I just got told to rock up) was at 1pm, however the guy's schedule was a little...off, so I had another hour to burn. This was both good and bad. Good because I had time to explore a city I hadn't visited for a fair amount of time, also good because I got to burn some of that nervous energy. Bad - I had to wait (I'm not the most patient of people) and the cost of this tat was unknown so I couldn't spend any of my money in the countless number of wicked stores surrounding me.
Finally, after an hour or so of running around Fremantle hysterically, browsing shops like a bi-polar woman in a manic state, and being the most whiniest little bitch to ever step foot in Five Star Tattoo, it was time.
My mum couldn't contain her laughter as she glanced at my face. I was terrified. My entire body was shaking, my heart was racing. Basically, I looked pathetic. Setting up felt like forever. At this point, I just wanted it to be over and done with. Several minutes later, everything was set up, sterilised, the colours were chosen & my fingers were trembling. It began.
"How's that?" "That...wasn't as bad as I thought it would be" "Hah, all that whining for nothing"
I didn't want it to end. I don't know how, but getting a tattoo is just the most amazing feeling in the world. I felt calm. I was intrigued by the entire process, I couldn't bear to take my eyes away. Already I can say, this is the start of an addiction, and I'm okay with that.
So it hardly even hurt. Yes, some bits stung like a bitch, but no where near enough for me to even mutter 'ouch'. I'd like to personally thank my mother for making me look like a fool in front of some very artistically talented people, and one of the hottest tattooists in Australia.
Half an hour later, I was inked, and smiling. At that moment, I was the happiest seventeen year old on the planet, possibly the entire galaxy. One week and one day later, I still have the itch. No, seriously, it's itchy as fuck. I have so many more pieces planned and next time, there will be more room for excitement, less room for nausea.
I now have a gorgeous butterfly on the inside of my right wrist. I know what you're all thinking, yet another butterfly tattoo. Why a butterfly? Nearly every inked up female has a butterfly, couldn't you be more original?
I have my reasons.
Some believe that butterflies are a symbol for freedom, happiness and new beginnings. Not many people know this (but now the entire world will), but I have anxiety and depression. Only recently have I stepped forward and done something about it, to help myself and spare others from having to experience my 'freak outs', extreme fatigue and my rollercoaster mood swings. This tattoo means a lot to me.
Freedom - freedom from the prison I've been encased inside for too long. Now I can recognise when I'm having anxiety attacks, and how to control them. I feel more free than ever before. I feel like I have control.
Happiness - This is the obvious one. It's been a week since I had my last breakdown. Never before have I gone a week without crying for hours, locking myself in my room, drowning myself in tears and fears. This is a huge step for me.
New beginnings - This is the start of a new life. A new life where I'm in control, where I can allow myself to relax and have fun without the fear of judgment, without the fear of unexpected emotions surfacing from fuck knows where.
This is the new me. Finally, I am free.
submitted by: bringjessthehorizon
on: 14 Feb. 2011
in Miscellaneous Tattoos
Studio: Five Star Tatoo
Location: Fremantle, Western Australia