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DIY

A friend and I had decided to do it a few weeks in advance. We had plans to involve more people but limitations acquiring supplies meant I ended up the only person with everything needed. It was a total DIY operation. I went to the only local place that sells piercing and tattoo supplies to the public, I ordered debarbed 8g hooks online, and picked up medical supplies, (gloves, alcohol wipes, bandages, saline,) from the hospital pharmacy near my work. I took my hooks to a tattoo shop down the street from my house to be sterilized and that was ... read more

Another Cut to Feel Alive

This, like many of my writings is about cutting in a ritualistic setting. In the case of this experience, I must say that if you ARE cutting, please make sure you are well aware of what EXACTLY you are doing. Accidents do happen, and I am the first to admit I have made a fair share of my own. Work with caution and patience-- or better yet, around those with medical background. Another cupful of sorrow came over me with yet another set of job interviews leading to a dead end. I wanted to share the experience with my Master, ... read more

A DIY resurrection experience

This is the story of my attempt to suspend myself with the help of a friend, Chris. I don't recommend you try this at home or anywhere else without proper background, training and equipment. I figured since I've suspended so many times I could pull it off on my own once. Chris has a D ring in the roof of his room and it can support more than his weight and my own weight (about 100lbs). So we decided to use that, and were going to tie the rig off to another D ring on the wall. I had four ... read more

The Suspension that Made Me Weak

Suspension Number: 9 I finally found my most challenging position. I've mastered the superman by far by going up in less than 60 seconds and staying up comfortably for almost 30. My suicides have gotten me up faster and up longer and swinging farther. My knee suspension from saturday took me 45 minutes to stay up less than 5. Why? I am afraid of being upside down for a long period of time, and the pain was excrutiating for me. For steve's birthday I thought I would try a new position, last year on his bday I did my first ... read more

Cheap Thrills (my knee suspension)

After my first suspension, I felt ecstatic. I felt overwhelmed at how amazing the human body and mind can work together to create such happiness in a whole new form. I knew my first would not be my last. Fast forward a year of traveling and I was back to my homeland with an amazing suspension crew nearby and a friend who wanted to suspend again as well. I signed up as soon as I could, paid the $100 fee and began to think about what part of the body I'd suspend from. Try a 2pt suicide? I heard you ... read more

New

Hello, I am 16 year old and I am a regular cutter. I have been a self harmer for nearly 4 years and see it as an escape. Also as something to just do. Sometimes I do it for fun though and experiment with different types. I vary almost everything you can in self harm. Salt and Ice, numbing creams whatever. But it's not ritual or anything. Just the thrill of blood and seeing how deep I can go is such a rush for me. I enjoy self harm experimentation and using differnt impliments to cut with such as broken ... read more

My DIY Pull

Before I get into this, I just want to state that this is merely a personal account of what I did and how I did it. This is not intended to be interpreted as the 'right' way, or even as a good way, to do any of this. I felt that doing it myself would be essential to how I experienced this particular event. If you feel that this is best left to the professionals, by all means, go to the experts; if you want to try something like this yourself, don't use this as a guideline. Do your research ... read more

My 8th Suspension

I must say, since the dawn of my first suspension my style has changed. As of today I have suspended 8 times, 2 superwomans and 6 suicides. Before I used to cry and whine that I couldn't do it. I would pull for about 45 minutes before I had the stones to get off the ground. Eventually overtime, and with pain, I trained myself to take it, accept it, and hold on as much as you can. Every suspension is different, some I can stay up for 25 minutes, some 10, some 5. It depends on a lot of factors. ... read more

Sutured Shut

2007 wasn't the best year for me, and I found that many of the troubles I had stemmed from how I interacted with those around me as well as what my general outlook on life was. As December drew to a close, I hoped to take some time to reflect on the year that was and think about the one to be. I'd wanted to do a lip sewing for a while (can't exactly say why; it just appealed to me), but wished to make it more of a symbolic ritual than a spectacle, and so was just looking for ... read more

Breaking My Suspension Cherry

I have been considering suspension for a while now, but I had never been able to get the nerve up to talk to anyone that would know where to actually go to do it. I know my local piercer had done it before so I got up the nerve to go in and ask him about it. He asks how much I weigh and tests my back and all that fun stuff like pulling on the skin on my back and asking where it hurts the least. He told me that he was willing to put me up whenever I ... read more

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