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play piercing...unexpected spiritual

The first time that I heard about play piercing, I was mortified, and just couldn't understand why someone would want to push needles through their body without the later gratification of jewelry. I would find out soon enough that there was an immense amount of gratification that goes along with the practice. Also, before I start, I would like to free myself from any litigation that might follow from someone hitting a vein, artery, nerve, or causing any manner of unwanted physical or mental damage before, during, or after if you have decided to try something like this. I am ... read more

Extraordinary things

The first time you suspend is like the first time you have sex; nervous beforehand, feelings of excitement and yet complete vulnerability, indecisions, and of course...pain. I've built up suspension in my head for so long. I've read a million different experiences and articles and I could barely watch a video of someone suspending without aching with jealousy. So it would obviously come to pass that I would be super excited about finally getting my chance to suspend. I saw the look on Josh's(my boyfriend) face when he got down from the hooks for the first time so long ago. ... read more

Cutting for a virtual lover

I am a Sub. I am here to please others, even other subs. I've known her for three days, and I was extremely horny tonight. So I kindly mentioned how pleasing for me it would be if she asked me to do something for her, and to my relief, she did. She asked what I was open for and I told her pretty much anything, which is true. We've already talked about cutting during sex. She asked me if I'd cut myself, and masturbate for her. I gladly said yes. My heart started to beat fast. I have a fetish ... read more


How can I possibly put it into words, something like that? I don't even understand it, what happened up there. And I'm really the only one that could. There are just some things that cannot be put into words. The only way to get it is to have been there, and even then, you'd understand it in your own way. I guess all I can do is tell it like it happened. I've long thought that the Lotus is the most peaceful suspension position - meditating on air, like a piece of classic iconography. I figured I had a lot ... read more

First Time Play Piercing. 53 Needles 3-08-08

My friend George (IAM: Hooked) picked me up at work around 9:30pm and we stopped at Kentucky Fried Chicken and he picked up some food. Then we were off to the hotel room he was staying at. He lives in New Jersey and came down for the weekend to visit. We arrive at the hotel and head up to his room. I can't remember if he ate first or if we got started right away. I saw on a table in the corner of the room he already had a few things set up. Box of gloves. Couple of bottles ... read more

My first suspension, 4pt suicide

I'll never forget my first suspension. Ever. I have a full backpiece and I was always afraid of having hooks in it, but I met with Tye and saw the scarring from his suspensions and it was very minimal, so I decided to go for a four point suicide. I had been deciding against that or a knee suspension for my first and decided that a 4pt suicide suspension was the way to go. We set a date and I arranged with Tye to stay over at his house that night and drive to Kitchener the day before. I gathered ... read more

I just want it to go away....

I started cutting in my junior year of high school. I wasn't anyone special, not a cheerleader or a "popular kid". I wasn't a slut although the rumors said otherwise. My dad had went postal on me when he found out I was getting high and had kicked me out of his house during the spring of my sophomore year. The months that followed were like a haze. They were filled with threats, phone calls and loads of guilt. During the summer I had started playing with my razor blades from my crafting knives. It was still strange that just ... read more

From self-injury to self discovery

For a good majority of my life, I have had the stigma placed on me of being a "self injurer". Through shame and guilt I have gone for 22 long years trying to hide the scars, making excuses and lies about what really happened, and wondering what the hell was wrong with me. Im not what people consider "Emo" nor am I an angst ridden teen. Im a man entering my thirties, college educated, and overall a well balanced individual. Very recently, through the help of someone near and dear to my heart, I have begun to look back at ... read more

there are no words for a suspension, but here's my attempt

I'm going to preface my experience by saying that not only was my suspension a fantastic event by itself, but also came at an opportune moment in my life. I went through a break-up a week prior and since that happened my mind-set has really changed a lot, and this suspension, which was planned prior to this break-up, has been like a gateway into my new life. Today, being 2 days after my suspension, I have greater clarity on the whole experience, and I just wanted to put it into words, especially since a lot of people have been asking ... read more

The Suspension that Made Me Weak

Suspension Number: 9 I finally found my most challenging position. I've mastered the superman by far by going up in less than 60 seconds and staying up comfortably for almost 30. My suicides have gotten me up faster and up longer and swinging farther. My knee suspension from saturday took me 45 minutes to stay up less than 5. Why? I am afraid of being upside down for a long period of time, and the pain was excrutiating for me. For steve's birthday I thought I would try a new position, last year on his bday I did my first ... read more

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