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Failed Suspension Attempt

I had done my first suspension on memorial day of 2003. Just a basic 4 point suicide suspension. I wasn't very happy with how it turned out. I didn't stay up very long at all and that kind of upset me. I knew I had it in me....so why couldn't I do it? I've spent this past year thinking of that and probably over-analyzing the event. But I came out of it with a better understanding as to what my problem was last year....and was able to realize that I don't suffer from it anymore. So I figured I was ... read more

a rod through my face

The following is a recount of a cheek skewering done by a professional body piercer/modification artist. I hope that this recount of my experience will offer an insight into an age-old ritual that has been trans-culturized to fit the needs of our modern 'sub-society'. I genuinely hope that someone reading this will go on to discover something in life that they may have otherwise missed out on had they not read this. I must also ad that one should always be aware of risks and go to an experienced profession for any procedure. For a little over a month Jason, ... read more

A Journey to Discover the Path to Serenity

A warm, long awaited release I felt as the blood trickled down my arm, onto my pants, making them crimson stained. I closed my eyes as I pressed firmly upon the razor blade that was cutting through my flesh and releasing all the toxic thoughts that were plaguing my mind. I discovered the refreshing attribute of releasing all fears, anxieties and stress through the cutting of my own flesh; I gained personal knowledge of the therapeutic affects that cutting, or what many mainstream individuals would consider "self-mutilation", during my tender years as a teenager. During times of extreme stress, depression ... read more

The best bed I've ever been on.

I've been thinking about making a bed of nails for months. But immediately after the divorce, I was living back at my parent's house, and it just wouldn't fly there. You see living where I do in East Bumblefuck NJ, it would be quite hard to find one, so I'd have to make my own. Shortly before I moved to my new apartment, I submitted a question to BME about how to go about making one, and received the following email Depends how large you want it to be.You should be using stainless steel nails if all possible, that way ... read more

Self-Mutilation

I spent the two hours of Geometry contemplating my own mortality. I'm fifteen years old, and I don't doubt that what you just read seems stupid and you assume my problems are trivial. They're in my disproportionate brain. Is that what you're thinking? You're right. And I tried to get help for them, but my parents wouldn't let me. It would look bad for the family and my brother and sister and to anyone who might give me a job or place in this world. I don't want or need to go into more detail. I only need to say ... read more

Playing with Needles

One of the many forms of ritual body modification that always intrigued me was lip sewing. I was draw to the beauty and uniqueness of it and wished to experience it myself. However I didn't know any professional that would help me with this so I began thinking of ways I could do it myself. I figured the easiest way would be to start with play piercings. I would push the needles through my lips, thread the sutures through the hollow needles, remove the needles, then tie off the sutures. It seemed like something I could do myself. The problem ... read more

My first experience with a frontal pull

I am bluezy and I am in a D/s relationship. due to of this and the fact that I am in training to become more attuned with the forces that are around me, I am quite interested in all sorts of rituals. A friend of mine mentioned the sun dance ritual to me, and I was immediately fascinated. Although I really hate the idea of pain, it is not a strange feeling to me. Pain has been my constant companion since I was 12 so it has become both a fierce enemy and a loyal friend. I use pain to ... read more

My first, and possibly last, pull

The first time I learned about flesh pulling I was looking through my piercer's portfolio and saw pictures of him having huge hooks pierced in his back. My naive self asked him, 'do you still have those hooks in you back?' He kind of laughed at me and then explained what it was all about. Him and 7 of his close friends went out into a field and put the hooks in each other and tied all of themselves together. They stayed in the circle for almost 10 hours until they were too cold and their knees wouldn't hold them ... read more

My temporary corset

When I was 15, there was a new piercer at the shop I went to. He thought I was 16, and "hardcore" and asked to do a corset on me. 6 piercings, just for show. I said "Sure", but it never happened. Damn. I brought up a corset a few times with my new piercer at Artistic Impressions, Lee (who later moved to Sonic Tattoos, and no longer piercers unfortunately) and she said she'd do it, but we never got around to it. Eventually I started getting work done by Pierre so I asked him. He said sure, if I ... read more

Flesh Hook Suspension

This whole thing still seems a bit unreal. It is almost a year since the last time I suspended. I never wrote an experience for the last time I suspended. I chalk it up to not quite knowing what to think of it yet. Now I did it again. And I love it. But we'll get there in a bit. But first a bit of foreplay... I mean back-story. A couple weeks ago I randomly ran into my friend Kevin at the hardware store. Kevin is the owner of Body Piercing Unlimited and Tattoo which is, in my opinion, the ... read more

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