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My first (and only) erotic cutting experience

For as long as I can remember, I have been fascinated by anything involving domination and submission. In history classes in school I used to want to find out everything I could about all kinds of punishments/torture that had been used in the past and, even as young as five or six I used to love role playing in games with my friends as a submissive character. Of course it wasn't until I was 13 or so that I realised that it was a sexual thing and that all of my curiosity and fascination during my childhood had been building ... read more

my first suspension

My suspension experience. Suspension and pulling had always intrigued me ever since getting my first piercing (tongue) at the age of 16. Years went by without actually getting it done my chance came with a few others. So it was last November when I eventually got suspended it was part of the celebrations of the metal guru piercing studio, Stockton-on-tees England, celebrating been established for 10 years they had organised a couple of days of play piercings, suspension and some other non run of the mill piercings. So the suspension rig all set up in the ally outside the shop ... read more

Into the ocean....

When I was a kid I had a recurring dream that I could breathe under water. The sound of my breath was the same as when you hold your ears closed with your fingertips. In the position of a Resurrection suspension- hanging from the gut- in a backwards bend- your breath is shallow and you cannot help but be very aware of it... As I heard my breath I was reminded of my dreams as a child so I had Jason hold my ears closed. I swayed back and forth on my toes to the sound of my breath and ... read more

3rd Suicide Suspension

Derde Suicide Suspension Het weekend van 21 en 22 juni was er weer de East Flanders Tattoo Convention te Affligem (België). Daar zou ik toch zeker naar toe gaan en ik was al helemaal overtuigd toen ik te horen kreeg dat ze er ook suspensions gingen uitvoeren. Ik had me dus aangemeld bij Xibalba om zo een suspensions te doen. Hij zou immers dat weekend de suspensions verzorgen, dus ik was aan het goede adres. Op zondag 22 juni 2008 heb ik dus mijn derde suicide suspension meegemaakt op de Tattoo Convention. Het was in een feite een beetje een ... read more

"Nine nights I hung ... "

After my first suspension at Wings of Desire'08 I was incredibly happy and proud of myself. Almost right after my suspension our friends came over to Månefisken to pick Jacek and me up, so I missed the show scheduled for the evening. We spent a pretty cool evening at our Norwegian friend's apartment, though, and somehow ended up watching not only videos from our suspensions but also some weird Japanese TV clips on the web. On our way 'home' Mariusz, a friend who was also supposed to do a suspension at the event, told us that he was not going ... read more

First Time up

For years I let at the white people do their suspension shit. I mean it was their, thing my friends enjoy it and I supported them for it, they make a little bread for it so I help them with it. They tried to get me up numerous times. My reply was: My ancestors would turn over in their grave, or rise rise up as ghost to tell me that "You willing let white people hang you?? We fought against dogs, hoses, slavery, jim crow laws, and you jump the chance to hang you???" So yeah I was bored at ... read more

DIY knee suspension

I wanted to do a suspension for a while. I hadn't suspended in a couple of months and was dying for some hooks. So I decided to take matters in my own hand and suspend myself. I tried it before, a 4pt resurrection, and failed. Oh well. Shit happens. So I decided on 4pt knees. I had done a couple of knee suspensions in the past and they went really well. I was up for almost an hour, but had tearing. The first time I had sutures, the second time we didn't have any, so I bled all night at ... read more

The closest thing to a spiritual experience in my short agnostic/atheist life.

So to begin, I had long since been fantasizing about doing a suspension, feelings which were only compounded by doing a flesh pull with Tracie Hanna (by Jared Anderson/Mute One) a few months ago. Especially since then thinking about it became very frequent, and the day the question became "When?" I jumped at the opportunity. Of course the reply was "As soon as possible!" and so it was, less than a week later my chance had finally come. Leading up to the event there was only mild concern in my heart, vastly overshadowed by excitement. Certainly the days prior were ... read more

Can Someone Put My Music On???

I resisted the urge to imagine, expect, and organize till Monday, July 14. Once it was there, I felt kind of excused, or maybe justified, to start making preparations. I started with the soundtrack for my soon-to-be first suspension because even though music plays a purely functional role in my life, I still enjoy listening to it while doing things. I did not know how long I would be able to stay up but my 'soundtrack' list had seven tracks on it. All carefully chosen, with key words distinct and powerful. I am verbal, into languages, so it just had ... read more

My chest-suicide combo suspension.

It was now Wings of Desire - Oslo suscon again and time for my sixth suspension. I've been thinking about what suspension I would want to do ever since the last suscon in Oslo. Since I had done a resurrection there last year I wanted to do something special this year too. As the date came closer I found out that I wanted to go for a chest-knee combo, then cut down to chest after a while. The main reason was that I wanted to try to have hooks in my chest to see if I was up for the ... read more

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