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the story of a girl.

I am now on the brink of 23. I have been dealing with self injury alone for about a decade or so. One might think that's odd. In over 10 years not one person has found out. Maybe that's because I am too ashamed to allow someone in. Maybe it is because I am just that good of a secret keeper. For me this is similar to the post secret project. Letting my secret free and still remaining anon. I grew up in a somewhat normal home I guess you could say. My dad was a blue collar worker and ... read more

suspensionüberalles

A week ago I got to experience my second suspension. And that experience was perfection. Many asks me how it feels, why I put myself through it, if it hurts terribly and all other possible thoughts that might pop up watching a man hanging from hooks in flesh. Many are even "uuhh, that's he who hangs from hooks - he must be a weirdo." Fine. I can buy that. It's a strange fucking activity. a) It hurts. b) It costs money. c) It takes up precious time. d) It's considered weird and you put yourself in a position where you ... read more

The best thing I've ever done

I guess it started a couple of months ago when I finally contacted constant elevation. Originally it was going to be a quiet thing with a couple of friends there with me, but that didn't work out and im so happy because of it. After finding out about the event i wasn't sure whether or not I was comfortable with suspending for the first time along with others I didn't know, but now looking back it was the best decision I have ever made. The day before I was going through stages of euphoria and being scared but determined to ... read more

My Self Injury History

Hey everyone. This is going to tell my story with cutting. I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed doing it, which was a lot. Just to let you know, I am fifteen and just started cutting a few months ago. I am also going to tell you now that I live a good life, have good grades, a terrific family and all of that what not. Being honest I find cutting as just a way to break my facade of the good girl, and also as a way to kill the boredom of my less-than-exciting life. ... read more

2pt 6ga lower back suspension fun!

I saw a lower back suspension on Modblog a long time ago. I thought about it for a while, forgot about it, and then searched through Modblog again to find it, which I did. I sent the pictures to Tye and he okay'd it for my next suspension and we set a date. On that date, I met up with Tye, a bit early since I had to be in Burlington for an appointment, which of course, I was early for. He was scrubbing tubes and we talked for a bit. Another girl, whom I had met before, was suspending ... read more

Piercing through the pain

As of right now the only other piercing I want but cannot have is a lip piercing I believe it is called a labret piercing. Can't have it because of work but whatever no rush, just feel a little oppressed because I can't express myself and look the way i want to. It should be no one else's business, except for my girlfriend Mackra, what I do with my body no one should be able to determine how others can or cannot look like. SO I wanted a lip piercing but I also had the desire to get pierced so ... read more

Playing in the bedroom

My continuous expedition for something fresh and exciting with my modifications was recently triggered and satisfied by play piercing. I never really had an interest in play piercing. The only thing that I really could think of a time that I could potentially "use" them for would be a temporary corset piercing of some sorts. But I never really saw myself as being interested in blood play in a perfectly bleached-white bathtub, or make hearts and other miscellaneous designs with the hubbed needles, but something recently sparked my interest. I recently have put my modifications on hold, partially due to ... read more

Another Play Piercing

I'm a 25 year old male, with a professional enough career that visible piercings and tattoos don't really help much with finding a job, and enough layoffs possible that I don't want to stack the deck any more against myself. I was entered into body mods against my will by parents with a routine Genital Mutilation at 2 days old. Because of that, I've been working on Foreskin Restoration since I was about 18. About a year ago, I had 3 stainless steel staples put in my scalp, only kept them for about 2 weeks. Once had a smashed fingernail ... read more

Lotus suspension in a circus tent

I've wanted to experience suspension for almost a year now, so it was so exciting to discover that there's a suspension artist in Israel. I feel like Israel's alternative culture is always disadvantaged by size, but then again – the people that ARE into something are usually very friendly and open. Captain Howdy was holding Israel's 3rd Suscon by the time I found out about it, and it was to be held inside a circus tent. Strange as it may seem, this really psyched me about the event as I love circus-aesthetics and also I've never been to the circus! ... read more

a beautiful experience

I plan to talk about how and why I did my recent cuts, but here is a quick background as it were of previous cutting and mods. I have 9 piercings to date, 2 ½" lobes, 2 2ga lobes, a septum piercing, 2 nostril piercings, 2 labrets. I have been harming since I was about 10. When I was younger, I was so shy and didn't have any real friends...I was overweight and so desperate to fit in, I would follow around the popular people in my class even if it lead to ridicule and jokes being made on my ... read more

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