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A week ago I got to experience my second suspension. And that experience was perfection.

Many asks me how it feels, why I put myself through it, if it hurts terribly and all other possible thoughts that might pop up watching a man hanging from hooks in flesh. Many are even "uuhh, that's he who hangs from hooks - he must be a weirdo."

Fine. I can buy that. It's a strange fucking activity.

a) It hurts. b) It costs money. c) It takes up precious time. d) It's considered weird and you put yourself in a position where you easily get labeled in a way that is not always to your advantage.

Well, I got my arguments.

a) It usually hurts less than what you imagined and the pain is in general tuned out quickly. b) Yes, it costs money, but so does everything else in life and from whichever point I view it the experience feels invaluable. Also the price you pay is not exactly a ridiculous sum.c) Time is money and we all know that consumption is THE most important thing in life. Right? Yeah, but then... If I skip the pub twice I can actually afford something that most consider a life changing experience. d) You can always be anonymous. No one but you and the practitioner that helps you get suspended has to know what you have done or been through. Ever.

But way argue anyway? I don't need to convince you. The experience is mine and mine entirely, and really the reason I write this is to give you my side of it. Not make you put hooks in your skin. My body, my temple, my choice, you know. Plus most of you are freaks anyway. Now and then

The feelings this time and the first time differed greatly. I'll probably never receive the same pleasure as when I did my first suspension ever again. The first was completely insane and no words in our vocabulary can possibly be combined to adjective bubbling sentences that can justify the sensation. But this time was different. I can't find a better way to put it than this: If the first time was an orgasmic cascade of relish then this was a playful roller coaster of pure joy. Am I being over-pretentious? I don't give a damn.

Afterwards the joy was stunning - but if the first time opened up a door for me this second time was an orientation on the other side. Where the euphoria stopped in the "Coma" the rush of happiness brought me further in my "Suicide". The emotions are so overwhelmingly powerful during a suspension, yet sublime and still enough to be graspable. It's surreal yet so obvious.

One of the biggest differences between the two suspensions were the pain level.

I'm not sure if it was due to the placement of the hooks but piercing the skin to get the hooks in was really easy this time. At my first suspension it was quite endurable as well but this time felt I incredibly strong. It was so liberating to discover that the pain I had feared couldn't get to me. It was beautiful.

To get up this time went really well. After a couple of minutes of stretching to get used to that awkward feeling of being pulled my feet left ground and I was transformed into a wave of pleasantness. Whatever could be identified as pain was exchanged to a washing sensation. It was immense. The rest of my journey is a fog of euphoria. With great music in my ears and friends to make me swing back and forth everything known as every day life and commitments disappeared rapidly. In that moment I was really me.

After what seemed like a second and half of an eternity all at once I was lowered to the ground again. And take me by the word that when a body that has been elevated by hooks through the skin gets down to earth again it feels like a colossal lump. When you reach the floor gravity hits you in the solar plexus and the whole world is on your shoulders the same time as it rather seems that all matter become vacuum and nothing can take you further from the forces of physics. It is peculiar, it is exhausting and it is wonderful. Everything is upside-down, inside-out and whatever other ways you can be twisted around.

After being suspended alone for quite some time I and Yukiko met for a "Spinning beam". The concept i simple: A long beam with coils in each end and one fixed point in the middle allows two people to spin in a circle, go up and down, swing like animals, in combination with the bodies rotating around their one axis. Swinging for adults.

One word: Fun!

Consider it for a second. Read the above about how completely awesome and phenomenal it is to suspend by yourself and imagine to share that experience with someone else. In a huge fucking swing. Fun.

We spun, we laughed, we moaned, we smiled, we skipped around and we were lost in the sensation.

Since then it feels pretty obvious that suspension will be an essential part of my life.

Fuck desk jobs. Fuck crisis. Fuck trivial.

Go life.


submitted by: Dadilydoo
on: 08 Dec. 2009
in Ritual

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Artist: Bena%2C+CJT
Studio: Concrete+Jungle+Tribe
Location: Garaget%2C+Malmo%2C+Sweden.

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