There I was
I first heard of suspension when I met Jeff last august, at first I understood the concept but had no visual to attach to the actual act. Though I was intrigued my curiosity left me wearier then interested. I had gone to NY a few times and was lucky enough to get to sit in on a couple of different suspension styles. Every step was explained to me as I watched. My interest grew. By December the opportunity arose for me to get to experience the act for myself at a New Years Eve gathering. I was hesitant at first because of a metal allergy that I've been dealing with my whole life; I wasn't sure how my body would react to the metal hooks. Even though I was assured by many that the metal wouldn't be in my body long enough for it affect me I was still scared. while I was sitting in the attic watching another person suspend one of the people there named Leo came up to me and said "here I made these myself and I happen to have an extra pair, you take them." as I looked at his offering hand I noticed that these were not like the hooks that I was used to seeing with the other suspensions they were shaped like wish bones almost with a pin that ran through the gap. Leo said "I guess it was meant to be". I took the "shackles" out of his hand and nervously grasped them in my own. Jeff and Em looked at me and said "you won't be allergic to these they're made out of a different type of metal". Since I only had two, I decided that I would perform a two point suicide for my first time.
First Em grabbed each side of my back in a slightly different area and asked me "which pinch feels more comfortable", I answered confidently "the left" and he responded "alright" then they laid me down on the massage table and I could feel him and Jeff preparing my back with cleaners, ink and alignment spots, I grew more nervous with each passing second as I shoved my face into the table's hole. Unsure of what to do with my arms I clutched the table legs underneath me. I could hear Jeff talking above me but my head was somewhere else, the floor that I stared at was my only reality. Em asked me which breath I wanted them to pierce on one or two, I chose one, "better to get it over with quick" I thought in my head. I felt Em pinch my skin once again as Jeff lined up the needle to be pushed through. "Okay breathe in.....and out, pierce" said Em. As I exhaled all the air in my lungs literally forcing it out of me the moment was already finished. as I lay there I see a face looking up at me from the floor "how you doing" said a man we all called Ho. as I looked down at him wondering why I didn't see him poke his head in I said "good" and took another breath. His face disappeared as quickly as it came. The boys lined up for the second hook. "Okay breath in.....out, pierce" again it was over in a second and I began to calm knowing the first step was now over. Once they tightened and screwed my shackles shut I sat up and looked at Jeff, there was a commotion around him. I didn't know what was going on. Jeff walks up to me and shows me his bloody finger." I was so nervous piercing you my hands were shaking so badly, I got a needle stick, this is my first one". Em approached with cleaner and bandages and says "hey if you're going to get a needle stick from some one might as well be the person you're sleeping with, seriously this is the safest situation you could have gotten stuck on"! I looked at Jeff with a sort of admiration in my eyes it was the fact that even though he's done this a thousand times for others, to pierce his lover, me, made him nervous enough to tremble. For a moment I forgot what I was about to do I was so lost in him. So there I was ready to go, Brian was holding my ropes, Em got me all rigged up and Jeff held my hands. He explained the steps of being walked up and began stepping with me forward and back like a dance. I felt the ropes get tighter, my skin pulling, and my weight shifting. After about 4 steps back and forth I kind of jumped into it a little but yelled stop at the same time. My mind was racing, my heart followed. I took a step back to the middle took a deep breath, looked at Brian and said go. He pulled down on the ropes as I took my last step forward and up I was. The adrenaline the rush everything was happening so slowly for me but so fast at the same time. Jeff was looking at me shaking my arms to make sure they were loose. I counted to fifteen in my head and the burning the pressure in my back was gone, at this moment a huge childish grin was spread across my face. that's when I noticed
Jeff said I hung like a champ. I didn't know what that meant at the time, but later on I figured it all out. They got as much air out of my back as they could and I spent the rest of the night sore and beat up. I've hung again since this first experience and have all the intentions in the world to continue. For me it wasn't about being cool or impressing anyone it was about beating myself and not letting the fear of the unknown stopping me from experiencing life, I loved it and will continue to!
submitted by: crackerjack
on: 12 Sept. 2007