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My first suspension

My first suspension It was a really hot and sunny day in July 2003, and back in those days I lived in the countryside. My "friend" bena had left town to visit me for the weekend and we relaxed in the garden. I knew that bena was very interested in suspension, and that he had done it several times, but I had never tried it myself and I didn't knew much about it. That day he told me that he had brought some hooks, rope, gloves and needles and that he wanted to go out in the forest to find a good tree for a suicide suspension. All right, I thought, why not? So we took my car and drove away, and it didn't took us very long before we found the right tree. bena directly started to rig the ropes and then he showed me what to do with the needles and the hooks. First I did some marks with a pen and then I hooked him. It is strange but it actually felt normal to put hooks trough his skin, I never felt like it was disgusting, wrong or bad in any way. We had no pulleys, so to get up in the air; bena had to lift his feet from the ground. He was fast up and was soon spinning around. I started to feel really exited about the situation when suddenly he twitched and felt down to the ground. I don't remember feeling scared about it, but I guess that I, at least, must have felt a little bit surprised by him suddenly standing on the ground. I remember that I though that the branch broke or so, but it was the hooks straightening itself. bena took it by easy, and I helped him to take out the hooks. I tried to do it the best way I could but there was blood, leaf and moss everywhere. I don't think anything was very clean! When we were done and I thought that we were going home, bena asked me if I wanted to try a suspension. I still don't know why I said yes. Not a very normal way to react after just witnessed someone falling down, but I did.

bena hooked me for a six point suicide. One by one the hooks were inserted in position and I was surprised that it didn't hurt more than it did. Maybe the sun, the forest and the love that vibrated in the air, made me less susceptible for the pain? It didn't take long before I was finished and ready to be rigged. I remember standing there, I can still feel the feeling with the moss under my shoes and the skin stretching while bena attached the hooks to the rope. I was nervous and scared, but still not, a really strange feeling. As I wrote before, we had no pulleys so I had to let go of the ground myself. Lift my feet and fly, and after walking around for some minutes, stretching my skin, I lifted my feet. It was not easy to do it but I managed. The sun felt warm on my skin. The forest around me was green and blurred and I could feel a crawling feeling, my body got all warm and then I fainted. I don't remember anything from fainting but bena has told me that he had a hard time to get me down alone. The only thing I remember was bena giving me a slap in my face. After I got alert again I relaxed for a couple of minutes but it didn't take me long before I was ready to try to go up again. So up, up, up and it hurt as hell this time but I was really "on the go" so the pain could not stop me. I hang there for like ten minutes but it felt like forever. When I wanted to get down I felt like I was finished with a commission and wild horses could not make me stay up there for any longer. I just wanted to get down, immediately! bena helped me down to the ground and took out my hooks and that was another new feeling, I actually could not feel the hooks when he took them out. Felt strange. bena washed me up as good as he could out there in the forest and then we went home to my place for one of the best sex I had ever had, full of adrenalin and good feelings from the suspensions. This first suspension was one of the best experiences that I have ever had, doing it out in the forest made it just a total experience for both body and mind. But if I would have known what I know now about hygiene during suspension it would not have been made the way it was and maybe it wasn't so smart to do it alone, just the two of us? What would have happened if bena not could have helped me when I fainted? This is a question that still bothers me today, almost four years later.


submitted by: Anonymous
on: 25 Dec. 2006
in Ritual

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Artist: bena
Studio: in+the+forest%2C
Location: Kristianstad%2C+Sweden

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