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I found my zone - failed lotus turned into suicide

I'd always loved the look of lotus suspensions, even before I suspended myself they were my favourite. They looked so peaceful and chilled. My last suspension I'd done a superman, and had no problems with it at all. I'd been very happy and bouncy through it though, and I thought a lotus would be more chilled. I was worried about the legs however, and how painful they'd be to suspend from. I asked Alex who I'd seen do a lotus before, and he told me that the legs hadn't been a problem for him at all. Vampy also told me that the legs would only be holding their own weight, and that moat of my weight would be taken by the back hooks.

The day I was going to suspend I felt tired, and wasn't sure I was in the right mood for suspending, so decided that I would do a pull instead. I felt a lot less tired later. After helping with Phil's suspension, I got such a buzz from it and from watching it, I decided I wanted to go up after all.

Alex and Chris were going to pierce my hooks, in tandem. I put some old pajama bottoms on, and Alex cut holes in the legs where the hooks would be going. He then marked where the hooks would go, 4 in my back, 1 on each thigh and 1 on each calf. I had to sit in the position that would be comfortable for me in the air, so he could mark them. The pinching for the marking hurt me a bit, as my skin really hurts to pinch especially on my legs (not because he was pinching hard). This scared me even more about getting pierced there.

I lay on my front, and my back was cleaned with triogene. I was going to be pierced with 3.2mm (8g) needles and followed through with 3.2mm locking hooks (which were so pretty). In my head I was getting really scared of the piercings. Dina and Sophia were there for moral support, and Dina held my hand. I took a deep breath in and the pierced me as I breathed out. It hurt quite a bit, but nothing too scary. People giggled at my piercing face, cause, and wanted to take pictures of it :). They then did the other pair of hooks on my back.

By this point I was really worked up over my leg ones, the thought of getting them pierced was terrifying me. I thought seeing them being done would really freak me out, as it seems so slow when you watch it, and there's a lot of force being used to get the needle through. However, if something's in front of me, I can't not watch it or I get freaked. I thought maybe lying down would work, but I couldn't lie down cause've the hooks in my back. It ended up me leaning back on my hands. It meant I couldn't hold my friends hands, but I was so scared I'd have probably dug my fingernails into them to hard anyway! As it was, I gripped the edge of the piercing coach so hard! They cleaned my legs, and then both pierced my thighs. I'd worked myself up over that piercing so much, I hardly felt it! Chris commented on how easy it was to go through. A bit of fat came out too! I was still really scared though, especially of the last one. They both pierced my calves, and it hurt so much! But it wasn't too bad, as it was the last one, and I knew it was all over and done with then.

I went outside, and it was dark. Which I liked :). Vampy found the right position for me under the rig, and I sat on a blanket. People helped to link the ropes to my hooks, and I had a go at doing one or two myself as a distraction. I was so scared of my legs going up. I grabbed my Sophia's hand. I also grabbed any other hands that came near me I was so scared! Vampy was on my ropes. I decided to do the same as last time, get my skin lifted up slowly, and then when it was ready go up fast. Having my legs lifted up hurt so bad... At one stage I went up quite fast, I think it was when I was nearly ready to go up, and it hurt so much I panicked and my instinctive reaction was to grab hold of the ropes, which really didn't help at all! So I came back down pretty fast. Vampy said that 3 / 4 of my weight was up then... I tried again, taking my weight up slowly, but the legs were so painful it was too much. I could feel my head going funny, like it does before I pass out, so decided to give up on it. I think I maybe could've done it another time, just not then. I really didn't want to pass out as well!

I decided to go up suicide instead. Suicide had scared me before because of the lack of balance, but after all the leg pain it seemed easy :) Someone gave me a lollypop, and I got attached to the rig for a suicide

Roo was on my ropes this time. I held Sophia's hand again as I went up, and the feeling of my skin pulling away from my body was great, I love that feeling! When I was ready and on my tip toes, they pulled me up fast. It was so much easy than what I remember last time; I didn't feel off balance at all, which I did then. I screamed as I went up though, as it was painful, but dealable. I asked Sophia if she was taking my weight, and she said no, so I slowly let go of her. I wanted to swing about and take notice of my surroundings, but the pain was a lot. So I found myself slipping into my 'zone'. I've never been to my zone before. I didn't notice the people around me, and could only hear Sophia, but it was like she was far far away. After a bit I started to notice the lights of camera flashes in my zone, and they were pretty. After a bit though, they started to annoy me, so I asked for them to stop and they did. After what only seemed to me like a few minutes I decided to come down. It turned out what felt like a few minutes had been closer to 10minutes. Time flies when you're having fun :)

I was quite cold when I came down, didn't feel cold, but was cold to touch, so I was taken inside to have my hooks out. Chris and Alex took them out, rubbed me with triogene and squeezed the air bubbles out of my back and legs. Taking the hooks out didn't hurt at all.

I'm glad that I knew most people there, and felt comfortable with them, or I'd never have been able to go into my zone, as I'd have been too scared. A while ago going into a zone is something I'd never have been able to do. I'm so glad I experienced that. For the rest of the weekend and most of the week, I was so quiet and chilled from my experience. I did a chest two days later though, and while it was lots of fun, I think doing that so soon was too much for my body. I was exhausted all week and slept loads!

I loved my experience, and thanks to everyone that was part of it. Hopefully one day I will do my lotus! I wasn't too disappointed that I didn't do it this time though, as I got so much out of it anyway.

There's more pictures of my suspension in the Body Evolution Gallery on BME.


submitted by: Anonymous
on: 01 Oct. 2004
in Ritual

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Artist: Body+Evolution+suspension+group
Studio: BE+teaching+meet%2C+11th+September+2004
Location: Norwich%2C+UK

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