Hanging Around On New Years Eve
I have often dreamed about suspension, but I always thought that was all it was, a dream. I never knew that suspension could be a reality until I came across BME, and had the opportunity to meet the IWasCured crew. It seemed that all of my hopes and dreams were becoming the reality I was desperately searching for. I had found a place where I wasn't persecuted because I was interested in things that most people aren't, as well as a group who are dedicated to helping fulfill the dreams of those like me. Both BME and IWasCured have helped me in more ways than words can express. I discovered through research that different Native American tribes also performed various pulling and suspension rituals. Knowing this made it more important for me to participate to further understand some of my heritage.
I had the opportunity to work with the IWasCured crew in September when I did my first flesh-pull. At that point, I knew that a suspension was my next step to finding the person hidden deep inside of me trying to get out. I also knew that the only group I would be comfortable working with for my first suspension would be the IWasCured crew. They always put my mind at ease and allow me to go at my own pace. They also give me the strength of will to follow through, even if I feel like I can't go on. They are an excellent group to work with. The only issue was when would I be able to perform a suspension.
When it was announced that there would be a Modprom, I began to wonder if suspensions would also be taking place around the same time. After speaking with a few people, I decided to find out. Indeed, there would be an opportunity for a suspension, and I was added to the list. My dream was one step closer to becoming reality, all I had to do was wait until everything was confirmed. Soon enough, I was informed that on the morning of December 31, 2001, I would be participating in my first suspension.
I arrived at the designated studio before anyone else, that is how excited I was. The moment was growing ever closer, and I was excited and nervous all at the same time. This was what I had awaited for quite some time. My moment would soon be at hand, and all of my hopes and dreams would be realized.
I was taken to the area where 6 hooks would be placed in my back to perform a "suicide" suspension. As I sat in the chair awaiting the hooks, I began to allow my mind to drift to prepare for what was to come. I was about to embark on a journey that would bring me closer to all in attendance, as well as some of my ancestors. My family background is rich in various cultures, including the Cherokee tribe. The hooks were soon in, and my time was at hand
I was soon hooked up to the suspension rig, and would soon be going up. Tension was applied, and the pain was intense, in a good way. With the assistance, and coaching of Phil, I began going back and forth until I was at the point of lifting my legs from the ground. I was doing it!!! I was actually suspending. I was amazed and astonished all at the same time. I never thought that I'd actually be able to follow through, even considering all that it meant to me, but I did it.
While I was suspending, my mind almost seemed as if it were in two places at once. I was interacting with those in attendance, but I was also interacting with others weren't physically in the room. Each persons experience while suspending is different, but many feel a sense of spiritual awakening. I was in and out most of the time I was up.
While suspending, I was led on a spiritual journey. I was led by what I can only describe as a Native American medicine man to a campfire where other Native Americans sat. There was one spot around the campfire that was open. I was led to this very spot and sat down. I was welcomed into their circle as if by performing the suspension ritual, I had become one of them. There was no conversation being had verbally, but it was more of a spiritual conversation. It was like our spirits had become one, and we all knew what each other thought and felt without saying a word. It was a feeling of joy and elation, as well as a sense of sadness. A joy and elation that I had embraced my heritage, and a sadness that I would be unable to remain with them. I'm sure to some this sounds like a lot of BS, but this is what I experienced while I was suspending.
Once I came down, I felt a sense of sadness at not being able to remain suspended. While suspending, I had the spiritual journey, and wished that I could remain there forever. Since the suspension, eveyone and everything around me seem clearer. Everything seems to have an aura, or glow about it that makes it more beautiful. All of the anger and aggression I've had built up inside of me also seems to have dissappeared. Things that would have gotten me upset mere days ago, no longer even register as an annoyance. All negativity has been erased from my being, leaving only happiness and joy.
I have found the person hidden inside of me that has wanted to come out for years. My only regret is that I hadn't had the opportunity sooner. There is no way describe everything I saw or felt, but I have done my best to explain it. The only way that anyone an truly know all that is involved is to perform a suspension themselves. Through all of the pain, and all of the emotion, I have become a better person from this experience.
submitted by: Anonymous
on: 07 Jan. 2002