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MY FETISH ACT ALMOST CAUSED A RIOT

am seeking venues for my fetish act: Jim Rose Circus is contractually locked up until the year 2003. I live in San Francisco and I have a passport and would especially welcome European Invitations. I have some ideas to dress out my act using fake blood, juggling and acrobatics.
Direct inquiries to me at mofo@thepentagon.com

Oh yes about last Wednesday April 97 (Bondage-a-Go-Go) night at the Trocadero during their "WHAT WOULD YOU DO FOR $1,000" Contest I knew that money was mine 2 weeks before the contest, and that it would only be a matter of overcoming my self-consciousness about performing.

I was the finale as I had written on the sign-up sheet that I would be "Breaking beer bottles with my Cock".

They called my name, I took the stage and leaned against a barstool and began tugging at a string and opening my fly. My cock emerged and began to dance around on the string, which appeared to be taped to the tip of my penis. After about 30 seconds I gave a sharp tug and POW there was a 5-inch yellow rubber fishing worm dangling from the string in my fingers and my cock had disappeared.

COMPLETE AND UTTER AND INSTANT SILENCE FROM THE ROWDY CROWD THAT JUST SCARED THE FUCK OUT OF ME. I was later told that the audience thought it was sleight of hand...no way..."that fat rubber fishing worm came out of his urethra?"

The crowd was still silent as I pulled a big screwdriver (Actually a Bit-Driver with a polished 9mm-diameter shank) from my pocket and sprayed it with oil and then held it horizontally over my head.

Shouts of "Oh No" and "Oh my God" as my hand flipped the screwdriver to the vertical position and I began to every so slowly inch the hefty tool toward my midriff.

Once I got it in about 4 inches I used a rubber band to my ampallang piercing to go above the cable tie on the bit-driver to hold the tool in my cock.

I asked for a bottle from the crowd. Walking across the stage to pick up the beer bottle, the screwdriver swung freely from my penis. I laid the bottle on the barstool on its side (the fucking stool had a cushion so I knew it was hopeless) I poised with one hand on my tummy and the other hand holding the shaft of my cock with the heavy screwdriver poised above the bottle. That's when it happened:

They were chanting my name and stomping their feet and pounding the stage. The frenzy went on seemingly forever.... The commotion died down.... I smacked the bottle. Of Course it did not break.

I picked up the bottle and began wandering the stage with it offering it to the leather and tattoo posers on the stage as they cringed away from me.

Finally a crusty long-hair with a big tongue pierce took the bottle from me and I mimed that I wanted him to smack the screwdriver. He wound up like a Cubs Batter and let fly. The bottle did not break but the screwdriver slammed into the backstage wall.

My only regret is that I impaled myself so quickly, if I had pretended to back out at the last minute and leave the nightclub I could have really got the building shaking...

I did feel rather guilty knowing that a fellow contestant ate an entire can of dog-food with no compensation but c'est la vie!

Theoretical Next Performance Idea (Impotent Sea Snake inspired) Tongue studded vampiress performs fellatio. Tongue studded vampiress screws my 9mm thick 3 inch long hollow Titanium rod onto her tongue stud. Tongue studded vampiress gives the Penisguy VERY thorough fellatio. Tongue studded vampiress inserts worm with no tail.
Worm disappears. Tongue studded vampiress uses riding crop and manual dexterity to bring Penisguy off. Worm flies through the air

Tongue studded vampiress?

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submitted by: Anonymous
on: 01 May 1998
in Ritual

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