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Cutting the fear away

Since I ended high school, a lot of things have changed in
my life. A lot of things were changed because I meet someone, or learned
something, but nothing has done such and impact has BME did. To mark that point
in my life, I wanted to have a BME modification of some kind. I finally set my
mind on the BME hockey logo when it was declared illegal in the USA, and it had
to move. I realized that BME could somehow end up some day.

I had previously called
Efix at
D-markation about my septum dermal punch. I couldn't live forever with that
crooked piercing, especially if I wanted to show it a little. I didn't want to
go back at my piercer since I doubt he could get it strait. It was his first
dermal punch, and septum is quite tricky... While being at Efix 's
place I took the opportunity to get a scarification. I knew the hockey logo
would be nice, but I didn't have any specific technique in mind. There is so
many that would have looked nice. I asked for
Efix 's input, and he was
proposing skin removal. I booked an appointment 2 weeks later on Saturday
afternoon, when I'll be in Québec City.

On Friday, after a 10 hour trip on the bus, I drop at D-markation to check on the place, and
to calm my nerves. I had a 15 minutes talked with
Efix , and I knew I had done
the good choice. He was very nice, talking me into it immediately. I could see
in his eye that he was willing to do it. And the studio was spacious, clean,
professional, I couldn't have ask for anything better. I was then off to my
friend's place to spend the night.

Next morning I woke up late (not for the appointment, but
noon is late for someone who's working at 6 on regular days). I got breakfast,
and went off to the studio. I wanted to put some EMLA cream, but it completely
got off my mind. I walked in the studio,
and I was greeted by Oli and Efix ,
both huge smile witches helped me to calm down. I asked to get my septum pierced
first, since it was my ultimate goal. But
Efix suggested doing the skin
removal first. He had the design printed out, and after choosing the size, he
got the stencil ready. I got an interesting chat with Oli who helped me to forget the
upcoming scalpel time. A few moments later
Efix came back, and we got in
his booth to get started. He placed it, but I taught it was a little crooked, so
he changed it and it was perfect. I sat on the table, and waited until he got
everything out.

I was very impress on how much he was taking care of
keeping his tools sterile, and everything as clean as possible. I never had met
that much of quality work. Has he been getting ready; he talked about a lot of
mods stuff, piercing and such. We also talk about how the procedure would
occure, as if it was happening to someone else. This helped me to think
disassociate the blades from the work he was about to do on me.

There were 3 steps: The first was outlining, then he'd put
an anesthetic agent. The second step would be the equalization of the outline.
The final step was the skin removal. It was estimate to 2 hours of work. I was
hoping that after I could do my septum piercing.

I was so nervous, a guy who had the coolest mods I had seen
for real, that I didn't knew more than what was on his page, was having fun on
my chest... I had a second taught, but it went away when the blade hit my skin.
The pain was sharp and crude. Nothing I could compare to my DIY. I had to ask
him to stop every two or tree minutes. It was so painful, but I didn't want to
stop half way trought. Thanks to my ego that was biting the bullet for me. The
hormones hit me, the colors were brighter, and I was euphoric. I laugh of pretty
much everything, and lost track of a few things. He was moving around looking
for the less tender spot, and then moving on a tender one, then back around.
This helped me since it wasn't too painful at once. At some point I regretted
not to have put some EMLA, I think it would have gone faster and better.

I tried to keep my torso as much still as possible, my legs
were heavily moving around. It was moving so much, he even said I was dancing
for him. I didn't know what to do with the rest of my body, and I could barely
hold a descent conversation, the pain was almost making me scream. To avoid that
I was biting on my 10ga labret, any smaller gauge would have got broken along
the way. I think
Efix must have find me
annoying, I couldn't talk, so I kept asking him to talk about such or such mod
he had (especially his tongue split).

I never had anyone looking at me while having a mod, but Oli got around. When I saw his smile
and eyes, I knew it was worthy of biting the bullet. I tried to be thought; even
tho I wasn't looking like it! At some point
Efix asked me if I was sure if
I wanted it, I knew before, and I know now, but while it was happening it was
no. I even asked why I was there, and Oli
answered "to dermal punch your septum..." Almost done the first step, Efix got the
dermal punch to do the holes on the mask. These were VERY painful. Luckily I
found the grip on the table. Unlike my local piercer, where it's on the sides,
it was above my head. After being sure the grip was solid, I took a deep breath,
and move on the second out of 6. The feeling was atrocious. In my head it felt
like someone had chew off the eraser out of a pencil, and was stabbing me with
the metal left. The hot, itchy, twisty, burning feeling was making me whine. A
few cuts were left to do after the dermal punch, and they were not that bad,
just feeling like a cat scratches.

We took a break; the 2 hours were pretty much killed in the
first step. At this point I wanted to quit. I was so much bored, tired, and in
pain, I didn't want to go on.

Jay Marceau
and a few more people were in the lobby, and they made a few comments about how
nice it would be. Efix said a few
nice comments on the BME Celt rings I DIY on my leg. These few words might look
like nothing, but it helped me to go into the second step.

I walk back in the booth, laid
down, and he put some anesthetic agent. I was use to the EMLA numbing effect, so
I didn't taught it would be that good. I started to talk with Oli while letting the liquid soak
gauze on the cuts. After a good 2 minutes of resting, Efix took the gauze off, and started
to even out the cuts. I was talking, and suddenly I just realize that he was
back at work. At that point it was scary as hell: I could feel the blade moving, Efix's finger, and some stretching,
but not the sharp feeling... For the next 2 hours, it was evening that out, and
numbing from time to time. There was one soft spot where it was very tender, on
the outermost part toward the armpit. The motion of that area might have
something to do with the feeling I had. I think it was worse since the rest I
barely felt anything. There was a few people walking in and out, helping to kill
the time.

I
was laying down when he finally got the second part done. He put more numbing
stuff, and massages it in this time. I was nervous about taking some skin off;
the idea was giving me shivers. I focused on the ceiling trying to think at...
anything else than cutting skin away. He took a small piece off, and asked if I
was ok. I was wondering if he wanted to know if I was ready to go. He moved on,
the sound of the blade cutting the skin was disgusting. I can't compare it to
anything. He moved around to find the pieces where it was completely numb. He
was picking up the first corner with his tweezers, and removing with the lines.
I could say as soon as he picks up the corner if I could stand it, it was either
painless, or feeling like I would have stuck a hot piece of metal on my skin. He
started most of the lines, and then put some anesthetic agent, then removes
more, and so on.

He started to cut skin away, and
it was freaky. The pieces were a few centimeter long, and about 1mm or 2mm tick.
It was twisting on it-self, witch created the strings of skin. At this point the
studio was about to close and the two of us were quite tired. Yet it wasn't
done. He keeps on moving, but the anesthetic was confusing my system, and I felt
like he kept on playing on my nipple piercing or cutting on my collarbone.
Although I know he's too professional to do that, I did mentioned these feeling.
His reply was "I decided to switch your logo for a spider web and a bat..."

We kept going on and on. I was
hoping to be done within 2 hours, but it was over 6 hours on the table. When Efix said "tell me you love me", I
was wondering what the hell is he saying, and said I loved him on the confused
tone. He then said it was over. I was so happy and glad! I jumped to the mirror,
and felt dizzy for the first time that day. I was so proud to have a major piece
from him! And the result was awesome! I cried as I was happy! After a few
pictures, I laid back down to get a bandage. Even if I didn't bleed that much on
that day, I still had to keep it covered. He got some Vaseline over it, a folded
paper towel underneath the scar, and cling wrap to seal everything. Efix
proposed to do the dermal punch the next day, before I take the bus, I agree and
I left for my friends place.

I got there she was worried for
me. I was suppose to be back at 4pm or so, and it was close to 9pm. After
listening to her whining, I chose to stay there instead of doing on the party.
Even if most of my day was spent lying down, I was exhausted. She went out
anyway, and I was off for a shower, but I drop on my sleeping bag. I woke up at
4am; my shoulder was stiff and tender. I noticed that I had crusties on almost
all my piercings, but I assumed it was linked to the fact that I was sleeping on
a camping mat. At 9am I took the bandage off and got a shower. The water was
very painful, more than the removal it-self! I tried to keep it down, and only
splash the area to wash away the blood. I couldn't remember the aftercares, so I
only put some gauze to keep it from any dirt. I was off to see Efix within the next hour.

I
walk in, and was greeted like if I was an old friend (or so did I felt like). Efix took a few pictures, and did
Vaseline wrap. I got the dermal punch and I was off for my bus trip back home.
The 10 hours were endless, and my throbbing arm was hard to put in a comfortable
position. Once home I took a shower, did Vaseline wrap and was off to bed.

I woke up early because of the
discomfort, but it was good since I could clean and wrap it. But I didn't seal
it like Efix did. And I was literally
leaking lymphatic liquid. There was so much coming out of the places where I
didn't seal it, and from all my piercings! I send a message to Efix, to see if it was normal.
Apparently it was, so I didn't bother that much for it.

In the following days, the scar
was less tender. At day 4, I could let the water get on it from the shower. The
idea of the skin removal was still getting me sick. When I ran my fingers over
it, I could feel the crease done by the removal. But I took minimal care about
it, and tried to ignore the itchiness. My piercings kept me busy meanwhile.

On day 5 the bandage was
unbearable, the tape got my surrounding skin very irritated. I ask Efix about if I could stop wrapping
it, and he agreed. The texture at this point was like a rough counter top, but
it was soft at the touch, like latex.My piercings on the other were starting to
look better, and only my ears gaved me a bit more trouble.

The next day my arm was stiff,
and I couldn't do all my usual motions. Some scabs were appearing, but I
couldn't pick at it yet. The stiffness in my chest and shoulder last about 3
days, until we had a heat wave. The heat was intolerable, but overnight it
helped to dry out my scar. The next morning I was able to remove the thin layer
of skin by rubbing softly over it with my thumb, and the bigger pieces fell off
when I got out of the shower. From then on, my shoulder was alright.

The texture moved on from the
"Fleshy latex" to "Dry healing wound". The feelings are more tolerable, and I
keep on touching it. The skin is slowly healing in a pink shade, with
unnoticeable texture. It's still healing, but I have a good idea on what it will
look like!

When I think back that a year
ago I didn't had any mod but a tattoo. I realize that BME has changed my life
like nothing had before. I'm proud to wear a BME hockey logo scarification on my
chest. Now even if it comes to be removed from the net (witch I doubt, and hope
it never happens) I will have a proof of what changed my life for the better.

Details

submitted by: Anonymous
on: 04 Aug. 2005
in Scarification

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Artist: Efix
Studio: D-Markation
Location: Quebec+City

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