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Healing Myself-The story of my first brand

 Well, I think a brief introduction is in order, I have been interested in body modifications and how they affect higher planes of thinking for as long as I can remember. As a child I had dreams of suspension, although I did not know anything about this practice, in these dreams it was usually a suicide or knee suspension, quite often it I woke up feeling a throbbing where the hooks had been in my dreams. I've always wanted permanent piercings for this reason, but alas the back piercings while have to wait. Anyway, back to the present, I decided that my body was in fact incomplete somehow about three weeks ago, so I thought about it and came to the conclusion that I was indeed was ready to take the leap into more permanent modifications (lets face it piercing is rarely permanent), I have already acquired 9 piercings in various places that have stayed, with many coming and going. I had a scalpel scar that faded due to lack of depth and missed it greatly. So branding was m y method of choice this time around, I decided after much experimentation and such that my ankle would be the most appropriate for this particular piece of work. My reasons were; it was the easiest to control the spasms that occur when pressing hot metal to flesh, I would not have to contort my body to do it and therefore would be more comfortable and relaxed, which we all know is very important to be when doing such things to your body.  
  The night that the urge finally was to strong to resist I gathered my rather primitive tools; a small nail, a piece of cloth, and a candle, I prefer simplicity, and set about mentally and psychically preparing myself for what was to come. I had decided on a simple design made up of dots and slashes, this was after all my first true attempt and I did not want to bite off more than I could chew so to speak. I cleaned the area around me, my skin, and my tools as best I could. I sat in a chair with everything within my reach and began soaking the cloth in water, I used this as a sort of handle for the nail, both to prevent burning my fingertips and to get a better grip on the nail. I heated the nail head in the flame for about 10 seconds and pressed it into my ankle, I jerked a bit at first but refused to lift it, I could hear and smell my flesh sizzling and burning, not the most pleasant of things but nothing I could not handle, as was the case with the pain as well. The  design was of a dot with 4 other dots at north, east, south, and west; with slashes in between each dot. I appreciate such designs in branding and scaring, well ones that I am doing myself anyway. The scar that I completed on my left thigh that faded was a King Hittite hieroglyphic representing unique divinity and authority, I chose this because I was in a period of especially bad abuse in a relationship in which I have no choice, I have to stay because he's my father.  It was my way of reclaiming my body; it took the place of random slashing of a razor like I had been doing. I was making a use of my weakness, using it to make me more beautiful, in my eyes anyway.

Anyhow, I digress, the burn was roughly 1/8 an inch deep and the dots are about 1/4 of an inch in diameter with the lines being ½ inch long. Healing has been quite favorable with only a minimal amount of weeping, for aftercare I leave it alone expect for washing it to prevent infections, which is a common occurrence with burns and brands. Hopefully it will continue on the path in which it is going now, a beautiful expression of I am and what I will be, myself. I wish the same for you.
Note: I am aware that I did this branding with generally thought to be improper methods. I do not recommend it to anyone. I do not regret what I have done but I feel that I should say to get it done by a professional, the only reason that I did not is that I could not find a practitioner which I trusted and I am also limited by distance because I do not have, nor want, a license. I know this has probably been said before but, do you homework, research what you want and learn ways to get it, think about it also, is it really what you want, can you handle what is involved in getting it and the implications it may have afterwards. The last thing anyone wants is a badly done, infected, generally, bad modification. Its you body take care of it, or no one else will.


submitted by: Anonymous
on: 10 Jan. 2002
in Scarification

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Artist: Elizabeth
Studio: Earth
Location: Lakeport

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