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Body Modification at 14/Scarification experience

First I will tell you about myself. I am just a 14-year-old girl. Living in a "suburb-like town" in my upstairs apartment with my mom and her boyfriend. I love body modification, everything from piercing, to tattoos, to stretching, and mainly to scarification. It all began with my first ear piercing at a year or two old, because my mom thought it was "cute". Those turned out lopsided, but that's beside the point. Then at eleven years old, I got my first cartilage; it healed well. At twelve I decided I wanted more and got my second and third ear piercings at the same time; they also healed well. My last piercing is my second cartilage. That was done about twelve to sixteen weeks ago, and STILL is healing. I treated it they same as the others, but for some reason it got infected. All my piercings were done at small shops in the mall with a gun. So as of now, I have eight piercings and I look forward to perhaps a tongue, eyebrow, or nipple piercing when I am older. After my string of piercings I got involved with self-harm, I cut myself. That started with safety pin carvings out of anger, curiosity, and boredom. My first razor cutting ever is a five-pointed star on my left ankle done in my friend's bathroom with another cutter friend of mine. It was done early in this summer and I still have the scar. It's beautiful. I found one of those pink bic plastic razor-things used for shaving, and pretty much pulled it apart to get the razor inside. I have to admit, it was not all that sterile and I used it after my friend did, but it was good none the less. That first razor cutting lead me to more, some out of self-harm and some out of body modification. It even turned into an addiction. I have scars of asterisks, straight lines, and carvings of words like, "Alone" and "Stupid". Some people might think I write that to make myself feel bad, but in truth it makes me feel better. It is the only way to make me feel better. In fact, one of my favorite cuttings is just a straight line. It was done after a particularly hard day of that little thing called life, so I needed to relieve stress and anger. It is a deep straight line from one side of my left thigh to the other. My left arm, both of my upper thighs, and my ankles are now a portrait of self-harm/scarification beauty. Some people at school know that I do this, and all of my five friends know too. I usually get asked, "What happened?" and "Why did you do that!?". But, I blow off those stupid comments with, "I have a cat." and if I KNOW that that person knows exactly what happened and is just asking to make sure, I say, "I fell on glass." I hate when little preppies come up to me and ask, but I have no problem talking about it, as I am now. Right now, I'm looking forward to my fifteenth birthday on which my mother has promised my first tattoo. It will be a very tiny silver music note. Or perhaps a stretching which I have not talked about to my mom yet. I also look forward to a cutting on my face, but I do not think that will happen. First, I would not be able to do it until... what?! My mom is... dead! Hehe, and second, I do believe that people would be close-minded and it would effect my ability to get a job. One thing I am not into is getting cuttings professionally done. My scars are for me, no one else, and they are not supposed to be professional. They are supposed to be private and emotion filled, MY emotion. The reason I see my scars as beautiful is because I did them, because the emotion I put into them makes it beautiful. I know I am young, but I also know the difference between self-harm and the art of body modification. BME has inspired me and changed my whole out look on how truly different I might be (which is good :- P). BME is truly amazing, it can be for everyone, people who are just into ear piercing, to people who are into the extreme-ist shit in the world. I'm glad that BME is out there, for people like me, because I know that its something I have personally learned from. I myself, am not into extreme stuff, but I know how informative BME is to me, and it helps. Thankyou Ps- my parents do not know about my scarification and self-harm. And my second cartilage piercing is sort of a secret I keep from my dad hehe.


submitted by: Anonymous
on: 16 Sept. 2001
in Scarification

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Artist: Me
Studio: My+Room
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