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Slicing Me Up

Well, I've recently been branded, twice: on my left forearm and also on my chest. It's been nearly four weeks since the first one, and three since the second one. They've both healed very evenly, without infection, giving me some very nice pink marks. I was planning on getting another brand as soon as the two I had had completed their initial healing. I wanted to get an ankh in the center of my back about halfway down; I had even made the metal piece for it, but we had a change of plans. (This doesn't mean I'm not going to get that one, I'm just going to wait awhile.)

For the longest time I've wanted wings on my back. Sure, it's sort of a tattoo cliche, almost a modern version of the "anchor" or "MOM" tattoo, but getting wings leaves you a lot of creativity when it comes to design and placement. I would never get any standard wings. They would have to be something I designed myself, and I had yet to create a style I liked. Well, the other day I was doing a drawing of myself (or at least an idealized version, one with a few less pounds) and drew on the ankh I was planning to get. Then on a whim I sketched some wings onto myself. They were exactly what I had been looking for! They looked great, especially with the ankh. (Perhaps I'll have to submit the picture to the art section of BME) Looking at them though, they didn't look like something I'd want tattooed on, but I knew I had to have them. They were also too big to brand on, at least bigger than I felt like dealing with. I had just finished dealing with the healing brand on my chest, and was none too relieved when that no longer caused constant pain. So really I had one option left, one I felt like trying anyway: cutting.

I didn't know when I would get this cutting, after all, it WAS rather big. But of course I tend to be rather impulsive, so the next day I told my roommate and partner in crime, Chris (the same guy who did my brands as well) that I wanted to get the cutting done. So we decided to do it later that day.

Now, before I go on I must stress the fact that you REALLY shouldn't do this. It wasn't a very smart thing as you will see. We used the wrong equipment, etc. But at least we were very careful and were as sterile as possible. What I'm saying is DON'T TRY THIS AT HOME! There, now no one should be able to sue me.

Ok, first thing we did wrong: we went to the hardware store and picked up a pack of razor blades. This is bad. You should use a scalpel. It's safer, sharper, and gives better cuts. Second thing we did wrong: I got loaded for the second and probably last time in my life. Alcohol may take some of the pain away, but it also thins the blood out a great deal.

After we did these two horrible things, I sat in a chair and had Chris draw the wing design on my back with a green marker. This took some time, especially since I decided I didn't like the placement and I made him draw them over again. He wasn't too happy about that. But after he drew them on we began the process. We went to a corner room in our house we long ago dubbed "The Monkey Room" and turned into a sort of studio. I laid down on a canvas drop cloth I usually use for painting (we didn't have any towels that we could spare to get blood on) and began prepping myself mentally, or as well as I could being extremely drunk.

Chris asked me if I was ready, I said yes, and he began to slice away. I don't think I really need go into detail about this. We all know pretty much how it's done. You cut through the skin. Ack. It hurt quite a bit, even in my state of inebriation. By the time he was finished I was quite sore. We made some blood prints and he wiped me up. Then we decided to rub red India Ink into the cuts. Ok, let me tell you folks, this was one of the most painful things I've ever experienced. I think that's all I really need to say about it.

Bathing that night was pretty bad too, but by the time I dried off the pain had subsided quite a bit. It didn't hurt at all during the night, but unfortunately when I woke up in the morning I had a perfect blood print of two wings on my white undershirt. That's sitting in a basin of bleach and water as I type this. The cuts seem already to have raised and spread nicely, and tonight we're going to take a soft-bristled toothbrush and scrub it down to irritate it. THAT ought to make it leave a good scar. :)

-John Whitby Jaalyn@blackmail.zzn.com

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submitted by: Anonymous
on: 15 March 1999
in Scarification

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