Popped the Ink Cherry
Saturday the 27th of March, 2010 - Probably one of the happiest days of my life. I've never felt so anxious, nervous, nauseous, happy or excited, ever. To be one hundred per cent honest, I was completely shitting myself. Since I was underage, I had to have my mother with me, for permission. She has 5 tattoos, so I trusted her judgment when it came to the extent of the pain. But, of course, being the strange & cruel person she is, she decided to absolutely freak me out by exaggerating the feeling of getting a tattoo.
"The shading felt like he was just dragging a hot butcher's knife, up and down." Standing in the studio, waiting ever so patiently, I felt like vomiting. Never have I ever been so nervous that I felt like puking. This was a day for many firsts. I'm pretty sure everybody in the room was chuckling behind my back, but, whatevs.
Finally, after an hour or so of running around Fremantle hysterically, browsing shops like a bi-polar woman in a manic state, and being the most whiniest little bitch to ever step foot in Five Star Tattoo, it was time.
My mum couldn't contain her laughter as she glanced at my face. I was terrified. Everything was set up, sterilised, the colours were chosen & my fingers were trembling. It began.
"How's that?" "That...wasn't as bad as I thought it would be" "Ha, all that whining for nothing"
Yeah, it hardly even hurt. Yes, some bits stung like a bitch, but no where near enough for me to even mutter 'ouch'. I'd like to personally thank my mother for making me look like a fool in front of some very artistically talented people, and one of the hottest tattooists in Australia.
Half an hour later, I was inked, and smiling. At that moment, I was the happiest seventeen year old on the planet, possibly the entire galaxy. One week and one day later, I still have the itch. No, seriously, it's itchy as fuck. I have so many more pieces planned and next time, there will be more room for excitement, less room for nausea.
I now have a gorgeous butterfly on the inside of my right wrist. I know what you're all thinking, yet another butterfly tattoo. Why a butterfly? Nearly every inked up female has a butterfly, couldn't you be more original?
I have my reasons.
Some believe that butterflies are a symbol for freedom, happiness and new beginnings. Not many people know this (but now the entire world will), but I have anxiety and depression. Only recently have I stepped forward and done something about it, to help myself and spare others from having to experience my 'freak outs', extreme fatigue and my roller-coaster mood swings. This tattoo means a lot to me.
Freedom - freedom from the prison I've been encased inside for too long. Now I can recognise when I'm having anxiety attacks, and how to control them. I feel more free than ever before. I feel like I have control.
Happiness - This is the obvious one. It's been a week since I had my last breakdown. Never before have I gone a week without crying for hours, locking myself in my room, drowning myself in tears and fears. This is a huge step for me.
New beginnings - This is the start of a new life. A new life where I'm in control, where I can allow myself to relax and have fun without the fear of judgment, without the fear of unexpected emotions surfacing from fuck knows where.
Unfortunately, the day I went back to work, I slightly messed up this piece. As the tattoo was scabbing and healing, I had scraped my wrist and accidentally pulled some of the ink out. Luckily, it's pretty unnoticeable, but it still bugs me. I cannot wait to get it touched up, but I'm having a little trouble finding the money to do it as I've just booked my third tattoo. Three in six months. My name is Jessica, and I'm addicted to getting tattooed.
Overall, this experience was amazing. I couldn't ask for a better first tattoo; It's packed full of meaning and absolutely beautiful. I receive nothing but compliments from people who see it, which is a fair few considering I work in customer service. I really am grateful to my mum who gave consent for this tattoo as I was underage at the time. I've haven't exactly told her about the meaning behind it. Well, I haven't really told her there is a meaning behind it altogether. But it's also something I'd like to keep personal. I like that people assume I chose a butterfly because it's popular and pretty in a way. My reasons and experience isn't something I like to tell just anybody who asks.
Nearly seven months later, I still love this tattoo. I know I'll never grow tired of it.
submitted by: bringjessthehorizon
on: 18 Oct. 2010
in Wildlife and Nature Tattoos
Artist: Shannon Ginbey
Studio: Five Star Tattoo
Location: Fremantle, Western Australia