"I have come too far, and I cannot return..."


Last updated on March 14, 2011 February 5, 2016 March 1, 2019



I am:

  • 32 years old 37 years old 40 years old
  • Looking at BME pages since the BME/WORLD started.
  • Member of IAM since August, 2002
  • Former maker of body jewelery.
  • I have lived in the Wizard's Tower... (In fact, it's "mine") A funky apartment in Kensington Market, in a building covered in psychedelic paintings, I've been there for 5 years as of April 1st. 2011 Now live in my dead grandparent's derelict and disintegrating house since end of May, 2011
  • I live with a girl named Gilly-Bean, a busker named Jamie who is about to move out, my long term girlfriend/fiancée (see below) and my two four kitties Aurynn Pants Magnificence (a magnificent tabby) and the Golden-eyed Commander of Wishes ("Goldie") (a gold, white and black calico) AND NOW Rudy (a grey tortie) and Norman (a beautiful sealpoint himalayan)
  • After about a decade of polyamory and womanizing I am in a single recent (1.5 months) long term (5 years as of tomorrow) (8+ years) awesome(sauce) relationship, with DJ Perple Doorknob Broomstick AKA City Center. 
  • Now recovering from a major depressive episode that lasted since late 2009/early 2010. still struggle with depression and anxiety sometimes but doing pretty ok in the grand scheme of things as of 2016. rarely suffer from serious depression or anxiety anymore.
  • I make art-objects, art installations, sacred spaces, and sometimes paint or draw (badly). Sometimes I make electronic music or mixes. I throw raves and volunteer at parties and festivals. Frankly these days I mostly work, drink beer, embroider, paint, play video games, do gardening and the occasional nature walks and sometimes cook a fancy meal for the ol' lady. I am a member of the local NDP so actually have to volunteer to do political crap. This is a lot more occupying during campaign season.
  • I have a propensity for breaking into impromptu dances and/or improvised song (this has still not changed as of 2016 2019)
  •  Can't wait for 2020 so I can compare the state of the world to the old RPG Cyberpunk 2020



    100 percent all-canadian beefcake! Who do you think of when you mastrubate? K-HOLE


Good Aftermnoon friends!
12/1/2003 | 0 comments

Wow, I'm groggy. I slept late, I have to go deposit rent like NOW. So let me just say: stainless was great fun. Heddi and I went out to Brians house and we got WasTed. There was a BIG power failure after we got home. Yeah, more later - too much to do - meg is coming over, then to johns art show - then to heddis chritmas party

Good Morning Friends!
11/30/2003 | 0 comments

Today is my first day at stainless studios. I have to eat breakfast. Crap I have to get ready! AH!

My acne hurts

MY LIP HURTS: I forced a 14 ga through it last night now its throbbing and cut-feeling, this sucks.

e x c i t e d ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !
11/30/2003 | 0 comments

Wooo! Tomorrow is my first day at stainless and I am really happy. I have so much to talk about from the last 2 days.

Ystrday I woke up kind of later than I hoped. Heddi went to work and I came down soon after to meet up with her. I had made her a lunch so she could eat (it was buy nothing day and she forgot to bring a lunch with her) and I met her at Meg's store and I expected Meg to be there since she told me she was working till 18.00 but I guess she went home early.

So I waited till Christina got there. Christina and I had a bit of an argument. We were killing time before the buy nothing day protest (I couldn't go, but Heddi wanted to) and we decided to go to the Whodunit? Mystery Art Show at OCAD. On the way, Christina said something about having to eat, so I joking as usual said something like she dindt have to eat she could afford to lose some pounds on her bum. She didnt take that well and said something very mean that changed my whole perspective on how I could relate to her. In combination with how much shes been saying to me that she doesnt like me etc. I just, well, decided a few things. Like I try to treat her like all of my friends but she cant take the cracks I make, which I EXPECT from my friends too, but instead she really tries to hurt peoples feelings, particularly mine. She's cruel. I don't like cruel people.

So then I went to Liz Meister's jewellery show and sale. She IS having another one. Anyway, it was cool but I felt a little awkward and I sure as hell didn't have nuff money to buy anything but it would have been worth it if I did. She was leaving very soon after I got there anyway. But she will be having another show I believe, I'm gonna have to check on that.

Yeah, then I went to work and I came home with Carlos, and heddi, Christina and Ben were there and so was the dog Honey. Honey is so sweet and cute! Anyway apparently guinny went after honey so he was in the basement. And christina and I couldn't get along I tried to talk to her but she said she didnt want to hear about it so I said she wasn't worth it anyway so I ignored her (but not honey) and I explained my point of view to Heddi, but she thinks we are both behaving wrong. Anyway, I got REALLY drunk. Then today I woke up hungover and went to work. Then Ben Heddi and I went to the Fox and Adellardo invited me over there in the first place and he insisted on paying for everything. eventually colin and heather showed up.

I decided to give it one more try with Christina, I'm going to call her tomorrow.

I'm so happy about stainless, but this managed to start a whole argument with jen which resulted in Heddi banning her from her page and iam.alive lists. well, that was all fun and good. (sarc) anyway, goodnight!

my god
11/29/2003 | 0 comments

im drunk

and i feel so very ugly. i looked in the mirror. that is a mistake when i drink.

11/28/2003 | 0 comments

couldnt sleep till about 5 this morning, now i am tired. going to meet heddi for buy nothing day, shes also meetin christina. then i hope i can make it to the um jewellery show at dupont. yeah elizabethmeist's show and sale yeah. then i have to work. things not going as planned. atleast i get to resign today!

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