"I have come too far, and I cannot return..."


Last updated on March 14, 2011 February 5, 2016 March 1, 2019



I am:

  • 32 years old 37 years old 40 years old
  • Looking at BME pages since the BME/WORLD started.
  • Member of IAM since August, 2002
  • Former maker of body jewelery.
  • I have lived in the Wizard's Tower... (In fact, it's "mine") A funky apartment in Kensington Market, in a building covered in psychedelic paintings, I've been there for 5 years as of April 1st. 2011 Now live in my dead grandparent's derelict and disintegrating house since end of May, 2011
  • I live with a girl named Gilly-Bean, a busker named Jamie who is about to move out, my long term girlfriend/fiancée (see below) and my two four kitties Aurynn Pants Magnificence (a magnificent tabby) and the Golden-eyed Commander of Wishes ("Goldie") (a gold, white and black calico) AND NOW Rudy (a grey tortie) and Norman (a beautiful sealpoint himalayan)
  • After about a decade of polyamory and womanizing I am in a single recent (1.5 months) long term (5 years as of tomorrow) (8+ years) awesome(sauce) relationship, with DJ Perple Doorknob Broomstick AKA City Center. 
  • Now recovering from a major depressive episode that lasted since late 2009/early 2010. still struggle with depression and anxiety sometimes but doing pretty ok in the grand scheme of things as of 2016. rarely suffer from serious depression or anxiety anymore.
  • I make art-objects, art installations, sacred spaces, and sometimes paint or draw (badly). Sometimes I make electronic music or mixes. I throw raves and volunteer at parties and festivals. Frankly these days I mostly work, drink beer, embroider, paint, play video games, do gardening and the occasional nature walks and sometimes cook a fancy meal for the ol' lady. I am a member of the local NDP so actually have to volunteer to do political crap. This is a lot more occupying during campaign season.
  • I have a propensity for breaking into impromptu dances and/or improvised song (this has still not changed as of 2016 2019)
  •  Can't wait for 2020 so I can compare the state of the world to the old RPG Cyberpunk 2020



    100 percent all-canadian beefcake! Who do you think of when you mastrubate? K-HOLE


Cat Years
2/18/2020 | 0 comments

Haven't made a diary entry in two and a half months so that put me at the end of the second row on the main page. 


I determined Goldie's birthday to be about Oct 23, 2007. Which makes her approximately 66 cat years old. I was able to determine Loki's death to be the night of Apr 21-Apr 22, 2005 but not when exactly we got Aurynn, I know it was not too long afterwards, perhaps August or September. I really wanted to know more exactly, but this information is apparently a casualty of the great purge of diary entries and photos after I broke up with Heddi. Regardless we can estimate Aurynn's age at (assuming Birthday in late July) at about 76 cat years.

Rudy I got on October 31, 2011 but her age at the time is unknown. She was at least two months old at that point, but assuming about 2.5 months old that would make her 51 cat years old. She has the teeth of a cat about 2-3 years old. 

Norman showed up the next year. He was at least a two years old at that point, probably more. His teeth are terrible, so any estimate that way is out. We'll say he is at least 10 years old and perhaps 15, which would put him in the range of 57 to 77 cat years old.


Meanwhile, since the holidays I have not been managing my diet, alcohol intake or calorie burns, I've pretty much made back most of the weight I'd managed to lose in the previous few months. However I'm doing well on weaning off caffeine. However I fell off the wagon in terms of weaning off nicotine gum/lozenges. I had planned on quitting by Ash Wednesday. For Lent I will be giving up caffeine (I have temporarily quit many times but afterwards I will treat it as a rare e luxury), porn (exceptions for my own homemade delights), candy/chocolate, alcohol except for ritual use, and I guess this will be the time in which I wean off nicotine, which is much easier when I'm not drinking.


My wife can't get a new student loan, so she is changing plans, she will be going for Personal Support Worker certification like I am. We also need to get drivers licences. I let mine lapse a very long time ago and she's never had one.


We have had a lot of veterinary expenses lately but everyone is fine now. 

No Title
12/31/2019 | 0 comments

Welcome to the Dark Future 

Doing a lot better
10/24/2019 | 0 comments

Or at least I am in general. Not so much today. All week I have been fighting being sick and today when I woke up I am probably the sickest I've been in at least a year, more likely two.

On the other hand I am getting married next Saturday, and I've been getting into better shape again after the summer of heatwaves and hiding in my air conditioned bubble. Plus I;ve been a lot more productive around the house. So that's basically where I'm at. I;ve got a big workday tomorrow so I've been resting all day so that I don't have to call in sick for the first time ever at this job (been there two years)


I'm changing my profile picture to the one from my wedding invitations.

No Title
8/19/2019 | 3 comments

I'm tired. I'm kind of depressed. I wish I was better at being a functional adult

No Title
8/7/2019 | 0 comments

I'm tired

 My friend Bryanna has scheduled her wedding a week after mine. And invited me. But just me no plus one or gf name. And.my last name wasn't on the invitation.

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